A wedding is a great holiday that unites two loving hearts in an eternal union. To celebrate the occasion, the bride and groom invite relatives, friends, acquaintances or colleagues to the wedding.
On the holiday, it is customary to give gifts to newlyweds to show them your respect, wish them happiness and make them happy on such a significant day. Many people ask the question: “Do they give young people an icon, and if so, what kind do they give for their wedding?” We will try to answer this question and understand all its intricacies.
Jesus and the Virgin Mary
Icons of Jesus and the Virgin Mary are considered a traditional wedding gift; most often they are given as a couple. Such a gift is almost always presented by the parents of the young, blessing them with a long and happy life together in abundance, the birth of healthy children, as well as the establishment of complete mutual understanding between future heirs and their parents.
Widely loved among Christians is the image of the Mother of God “Softening Evil Hearts,” which is often popularly called the “safe-conduct” of a young family.
The parents bless their daughter with the icon of the Most Holy Theotokos, and the groom's parents bless the icon of Jesus.
The moment of presenting the icons of the Mother of God and Jesus is considered solemn; it is usually held in a warm family atmosphere, without prying eyes. It is best to purchase such icons in a wedding shop; they must be consecrated by the priest.
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How does the ceremony take place?
If it is decided to meet the newlyweds at the entrance to the banquet hall, you need to decide on the roles in advance. There are no hard and fast rules, there may be different options:
- The groom's father holds an icon, the bride's father holds a loaf.
- Icons (one at a time) can be held by either fathers or mothers on both sides.
- One of the parents is holding the image, another is holding a loaf, the other two are holding a glass of champagne.
Then the parents take turns saying parting words - here everyone focuses on what they consider the most important. Then the parents should bless the newlyweds with the icon. To do this, the sign of the cross is drawn in the air with the icon, only in a mirror image. If you are not sure, you can watch the video of how the priests bless you in the temple.
May God's mercy be upon the young!
Nicholas the Wonderworker
Often, as a wedding gift, newlyweds are presented with the image of St. Nicholas the Wonderworker, for whom all believers have a special love.
The image of St. Nicholas the Wonderworker protects the family from various adversities and helps them in difficult life situations. People come to the saint with a variety of appeals: for strengthening faith, for healing, for the birth of a child, for the return of children to their father’s house, and so on.
In any young family, the image of St. Nicholas the Wonderworker will become a reliable protector.
Prayer of the spouses at the wedding
Lord our God, in Thy saving sight, Who was worthy to show honorable marriage to Galileo in Cana by Thy coming, Now Thy servants (names) Thou hast deigned to unite with each other, in peace and unanimity; Show them an honest marriage, observe their undefiled bed, bless their immaculate cohabitation and achieve the virtues of old age, doing Your commandments with a pure heart. For You are our God, the God of mercy and salvation, and we send up glory to You, with Your Originless Father, Your All-Holy and Good and Life-giving Spirit, now and ever and unto the ages of ages. Amen.
St. Joachim and Anna
Joachim and Anna were the parents of the Mother of God. An icon with their image is a wonderful gift for a newly-made family, which will reliably protect the marriage from adversity, as well as protect each of the newlyweds.
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It is worth noting that such an icon is capable of assisting in childbirth - from the moment of the wedding, young people can pray to it for a quick addition to the family. These requests are fulfilled in a short time. By the way, the Scripture says that Anna and Joachim wanted to become parents for a very long time, but they managed to experience the happiness of fatherhood and motherhood only in old age.
How newlyweds should behave when they meet the groom's parents
The newlyweds, approaching the groom's house or the entrance to the restaurant where their parents meet them, and stepping onto the towel laid out for them, must first bow to their parents three times and cross themselves (if they meet with an icon).
Next, if they are greeted with a loaf of bread or bread and salt, break off a piece of it and let each other taste it. At this stage, you can determine who will be the head of the new family - it depends on who broke off a piece of bread or loaf faster. If the spouses managed to do this at the same time, then you can be sure that there will be harmony and order in everything in their home.
After the parents serve the newlyweds glasses filled with champagne, they must mark them with the sign of the cross three times, which will protect them from possible troubles. Next, the bride and groom should sip a little champagne from the glasses, pour the rest behind their backs, and then break the glasses. After the meeting ceremony, the newlyweds can safely head to the hall to continue the celebration.
St. Peter and Fevronia
Another worthwhile wedding gift is an icon of Peter and Fevronia, patrons of the family hearth and love. It symbolizes humble love, which will last as long as the young people live.
According to legend, Peter and Fevronia were a true example of love. For the sake of his beloved, Peter, being a prince, renounced wealth and even the throne. The couple managed to live a very long and happy life, at the end of which they were buried together.
Not only parents, but also friends can give icons for a wedding. Such a gift should be given with sincere wishes for prosperity, peace and eternal love to the couple.
The Church does not establish any rules for gifting icons to newlyweds and does not note which saints’ faces can be presented. Icons given on this occasion often serve as family patrons and are also passed down from generation to generation.
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Is it possible to give icons?
Yes! And this is a very valuable gift that (unlike a set of pots or dinnerware) the couple will keep for the rest of their lives. Or maybe he’ll give it to his own children or grandchildren.
As a rule, icons must be handed over during a wedding. But even if the couple has only decided to sign in the registry office, but both (or at least one of the newlyweds) believe in God, icons can be given as a gift. They will serve not only as a blessing, but also as a gentle fatherly reminder of the sinfulness of living together outside the sacrament of marriage.
What will such a gift give the young couple?
If the young people live with their Orthodox parents, these two icons will surely appear on the paternal iconostasis. If after the wedding they are going to move into their own home, the images will become the basis of their own Red Corner.
And besides, wedding icons:
- will teach Christian values (humility, mercy, love for one's neighbor);
- will become a place near which you can pray, repent, thank the Lord for all the good things that He has given during the day;
- they will be reminded in time that the Lord himself blessed the marriage - which means that people should not ruin it because of trifling insults or quarrels.
By the way! In church shops and icon-painting workshops you can find not only painted, but also embroidered (including beaded) icons. And jewelry stores offer images in vestments made of silver/gold, or decorated with pearls and precious stones. Such a gift will not only be a blessing, but also a wise investment.
But store-bought icons may not be consecrated - be sure to check this point in order to have time to take them to the church before donating them.
Who else can become a donor?
If the newly-made father-in-law and mother-in-law buy a wedding couple, then other relatives and friends can also bring a blessed gift. As a rule, they choose images of patron saints - say, nominal ones.
By the way, you can not only buy an icon, but also draw it or embroider it (with threads, beads), or make it out of crystals. The main thing is to consecrate it before donating it. Also, some priests believe that before sitting down to this work, it is better to receive a blessing in church.
Parental blessing
Before leaving their father's house, parents give their blessing to their children, blessing their son with the icon of the Savior, and blessing their daughter with the image of the Mother of God.
Important! Only the baptized bride and groom stand under the image to receive the parental blessing with the help of icons.
If one of the young people was not baptized in childhood or did not convert to Orthodoxy in adulthood, it is necessary to ask the priest to first perform the baptismal ceremony, and only then prepare for the wedding. Unbaptized parents should not hold holy icons.
In Orthodox families, where the customs of their ancestors are revered, the newlyweds, before leaving the house, kneel before their parents, who read a prayer with triple baptism and say a short parting word, after which they present the icons to the children for kissing.
Icons for blessing the newlyweds before the wedding
It is important to remember that Holy faces are necessarily kept on towels, purchased or embroidered by the bride herself long before the wedding. With these images, the wedding procession goes to the wedding and wedding ceremony.
At the end of the wedding, the wedding images are hung or placed in the room so that it is convenient to pray in front of them. If the young people were baptized in childhood, but did not know the Faith of Christ, the icons are wrapped in towels and stored until the time of the spouses’ churching.
Text of parental blessing for wedding
Our Lord, Jesus Christ, I pray to you for the sake of your Most Pure Mother, hear me and cleanse me from sins, your unworthy daughter. Lord, our children (Names) are in the power of Your mercy, grant them mercy and salvation for the sake of Your name. Savior, forgive them all their sins, obvious and involuntary, that the children committed before You. Guide them, Lord, on the true path, enlighten the young to know and fulfill Your commandments, illuminate them with the Light of Christ for the salvation of souls and healing of the body. Lord, I call upon Your blessing upon every place where they will dwell. Savior, keep our children under Your protection from arrows and flying bullets, from heat, hunger and cold, evil forces and witchcraft, may their misfortunes and evil pass. Lord, cleanse them from all filth and addictions, heal them from sudden onset illnesses and trials, be with them in days of sorrow and mental suffering. Bless, Creator Almighty, our children with the grace of the Holy Spirit for many years of life, happiness, health and purity. Grant them, God, piety in family life and healthy children. Grant to us, parents, Your unworthy and sinful servants, to bless our son and daughter at any time of the day with Your name, with Your eternal Kingdom, standing forever and ever. Amen.
A look into the future
Another ceremony that will take place before the festive dinner is the determination of who will be in charge of the family. A wedding loaf is used for this ritual. This is a richly decorated bread. Salt is often served with it so that the spouses “annoy” each other today and never again.
An obligatory element of the ritual is an embroidered towel on which the holy bread lies. They fold it so that the white cloth is under the sole of the loaf, and the patterns hang down on the sides. Previously, girls wove and embroidered towels even before marriage. The brighter and more magnificent the pattern, the better life will be. Now the amulet can be ordered or bought.
Prayer to the Holy Great Martyr Catherine
O Saint Catherine, virgin and martyr, true bride of Christ! We pray to you, for you have received the special grace that your Bridegroom, Sweet Jesus, has preceded you to: just as you have put to shame the temptations of the tormentor with your wisdom, you have overcome fifty revolutions, and having fed them with heavenly teaching, you have guided them to the light of the true faith, so ask us for this Godly wisdom, Yes, and we, having thwarted all the machinations of the hellish tormentor, having despised the temptations of the world and the flesh, will be worthy to appear of Divine glory, and for the expansion of our holy Orthodox faith we will become worthy vessels, and with you in the heavenly tabernacle of our Lord and Master Jesus Christ with the Father and the Holy Spirit Let us praise and glorify to all ages of ages. Amen.
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Mother of the bride at the wedding
A daughter's wedding is always exciting. According to an old Russian custom, a mother blesses her little blood for a new life. The ceremony is carried out after the bride price ceremony, immediately before the marriage registration or wedding. Mom takes the newlyweds to a separate room and lights two thin candles, blessing the children for family life. Afterwards they stew and intertwine together, inextricably, as the destinies of two loving people should be intertwined.
In addition, the mother of the bride has a lot of troubles and concerns associated with the wedding:
You need to organize a feast together with the groom’s mother, order and decorate the restaurant, work out the list of guests and the menu. Or, if you decide to celebrate at home, then prepare delicious, festive dishes; On the wedding day, mom should come early if she lives separately
She, along with her friends, participates in the process of transforming an ordinary girl into a fairy-tale princess, a beauty queen in an amazing dress, with stylish hairstyle and makeup; At a wedding, the mother should look impeccable, because parents have one of the main roles in this holiday, and the closest attention of those present will be directed to them. Therefore, it is advisable to work together to choose an outfit that is suitable in style and ideally suits your figure.
It can be either a dress or a trouser suit - modern wedding traditions are very liberal in this matter. On the wedding day, the mother also needs to take care of discreet, neat makeup and hairstyle; One of the main responsibilities of a mother is choosing a wedding dress and accessories together with her daughter, thinking through the theme of the future wedding and sending out invitations. She participates in outfit fittings, selects the decor of a banquet hall, or supervises the work of hired specialists; if you are planning a vintage wedding, and your mother still has a veil, jewelry or accessories from that significant day when she got married, they can be used. This move brings people closer together and speaks of strong family traditions.
If the mothers of the bride and groom are able to find a common language already at the preparatory stage, this will help in the future to establish warm, family relationships between families. Joint shopping and atelier trips, making wedding decorations, and participating in decorations bring us closer together and put us in a positive mood.
What do they say when blessing the young?
There are no exact words of blessing; they cannot be memorized. Each parent puts his soul into his words and speaks as he knows and feels. The meaning of the ritual speech boils down to the following phrase: “We bless you for a long, happy family life.” Here are several examples of parental blessing texts.
daughters
son
Helpful tips during the ritual:
- Icons are kept only in towels, so they are purchased in advance.
- Before bringing the face of the saint to the couple for a kiss, parents must baptize the newlyweds three times: from top to bottom and from left to right.
- When blessing a young father, he should explain the main points of the sacrament in advance, since men are far from religious rituals.
Every parent should remember that the word “bless” literally means speaking for good. The words of the mother are especially effective, which in all centuries have been a powerful defense against all sorts of troubles. There is no stronger amulet than the strength of a mother.
