Hierodeacon Iliodor: “In the next world the first question will be: “Were you a man on earth?”

Iliodor (Gairiyants)
(1947 - 2020), hierodeacon Born on June 23, 1947 in the city of Baku. He received Holy Baptism in August of the same year with the name George in honor of the Great Martyr George the Victorious.

In 1966-1969 he served in the air defense forces in the city of Gvardeysk, Kaliningrad region.

Received higher economic education at the Moscow All-Russian Correspondence Institute of Finance and Economics.

Since 1989, he carried out obediences in Optina Pustyn.

On August 28, 1990, he took monastic vows with the name Theophilus in honor of one of the forty Sebastian martyrs from Archimandrite Eulogius (Smirnov).

On December 4, 1990, he was ordained to the rank of hierodeacon by Patriarch Alexy II.

On April 7, 1994, he was tonsured a monk and named in honor of the martyr Iliodor of Magid in the Vvedensky Cathedral of Optina Hermitage by Archimandrite Venedikt (Penkov).

Organized religious processions. Thanks to his prayers and labors, more than one temple was built: in particular, he patronized the Assumption Church in the village of Ozyorskoye (Podborki) and its restoration after the fire. He was an ally of Father Elijah (Nozdrin), whom he accompanied on almost all trips. He helped everyone, without exception, no matter who turned to him. By the end of his earthly life he was considered one of the most famous hierodeacons in Russia; not just a famous monk, but also a helper, ascetic and spiritual father.

I spent the last weeks of my earthly life in the hospital - the coronavirus aggravated chronic diseases. He died in the early morning of October 26, 2020, at the age of 74.

Ratings

«Father Iliodor never remained indifferent if he knew that a person was in trouble. I helped anyone, there was no limit. Everyone in need ran to him, they knew that he would respond and help. There was always a crowd of people around him who loved and hoped for him. Father Iliodor always had bags under his robe in which he carried gifts. When people approached him, he always gave them away; no one left without a gift.
» [1].

«To stay awake, he did something all night. Sometimes he couldn’t stand it without sleep: the brothers said that when they came to the temple for midnight service, they observed that the priest fell asleep while bowing. But I was always engaged in self-deprecation, did not allow myself to relax

» [1].

«There was never a time when he did not help someone in need. His phone simply did not stop ringing. Always lived by everyone. I was with him in the fraternal refectory. He ate very little, but he tried to feed others to his fullest. He cared, well, like a mother about us children. […] And how he played music, how he played!.. Dmitry’s father has a piano at home, and when father came to visit him, he always sat down at the instrument and played

» [2].

Hierodeacon Iliodor died at the age of 74

October 27, 2020

On October 26, 2022, on the day of the celebration of the Iveron Icon of the Mother of God, at the 74th year of his life, Hierodeacon Iliodor (Gairiyants), a resident of the Vvedensky stauropegic monastery of Optina Pustyn, reposed in the Lord.

Father Iliodor was born on June 23, 1947 in Baku. He received Holy Baptism in August 1947 with the name George in honor of the Holy Great Martyr George the Victorious.

From 1966 to 1969 served in the air defense forces in the city of Gvardeysk, Kaliningrad region.

Received higher economic education at the Moscow All-Russian Correspondence Institute of Finance and Economics.

In the monastery of Optina Pustyn he carried out obediences since 1989. He received monastic tonsure with the name Theophilus in honor of one of the forty Sebastian martyrs on August 28, 1990 from Archimandrite Eulogius (Smirnova † 07/22/2020).

The monastic tonsure of the future hierodeacon Iliodor was performed on April 7, 1994 in the Vvedensky Cathedral by Archimandrite Venedikt (Penkov † 01/22/2018). Father Iliodor was tonsured in honor of the martyr Iliodor (December 2).

On December 4, 1990, His Holiness Patriarch Alexy II of Moscow and All Rus' was ordained to the rank of hierodeacon.

In 1992, he received the right to wear a double orarion.

On Wednesday, October 28, 2022, after the late Liturgy, a funeral service will take place in the Kazan Church.

*** “The first person I met in Optina” - you can often hear about Father Iliodor from those who these days lovingly pray for the Lord to accept his soul in the villages of the righteous.

The most in demand in our time, and perhaps the rarest, has become the virtue of mercy. Perhaps this is why people who acquired it during their lifetime are so remembered. Undoubtedly, one of them was Hierodeacon Iliodor. Those who came to Optina, of course, wanted to join the Optina spirit - the spirit of eldership, prayer, mercy and compassion - to feel the gracious help of the monastery shrines, to give the human soul, tired of the storms of the sea of ​​\u200b\u200blife, what it most needs. Even if the person himself was not yet fully aware of this need. And, as if responding to a heartfelt request, Father Iliodor appeared before the pilgrims. In the years when the excursion and pilgrimage services of the monastery were not yet so developed, he told visitors about Optina and its elders, showed where their relics were located, listened and consoled people, offered to pray together, helped those who needed it to receive spiritual advice . Many remember his “bottomless” pockets, which contained so many apples, candies, and toys that there was enough for everyone he met. No one left him unconsoled. For many people, the Optina Monastery began with communication with Father Iliodor and forever remained a spiritual homeland. It was this first meeting that became the starting point for them on the path to God.

And in everyday life, it seemed to those around him that Father Iliodor was involved in all the good deeds that one could imagine. The inhabitants of the monastery remember with gratitude how he tried to help the sick and infirm, the workers remember his chocolates and oranges, which, probably at first, are still not enough for the worldly people who came to the monastery for obedience. He inspired philanthropists to donate funds to churches under construction, helped orphanages, almshouses, an Orthodox gymnasium, large families and the poor... His generous soul gave everything he had - strength, time, means - everything that he himself received in abundance from the Lord through prayers and the Queen of Heaven in response to ascetic life and sincere prayer.

The brethren and those who often came to the monastery knew how much Hierodeacon Iliodor loved to pray. Every day after the evening service, the priest, together with parishioners and pilgrims, sang an akathist to the Queen of Heaven, participated in prayers for the elders and the Monk Ambrose of Optina, and could often be found in the chapel at the burial site of the murdered Optina brethren - Hieromonk Vasily, monks Trofim and Ferapont. And after prayer, he always tried to tell people something soulful. I remember the impression of one pilgrim who talked about how Father Iliodor exclaimed, responding to someone’s remark: “What a shame for a 60-year-old woman to say, “I don’t know how to pray.” Who knows then? Ask Father Elijah for prayers so that you yourself have time to watch TV?.. Did the saints really watch TV?! Or is Father Eliy watching?!”

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• “He sensed when a person was feeling bad and came himself.” Monks and laity remember Hierodeacon of the Optina Hermitage Iliodor Gairiyants // newspaper Kozelsk
  , October 26, 2022:

[1] Testimony of Abbot Mikhail, governor of the Hermitage of the Savior Not Made by Hands in the village of Klykovo, cit. according to Art. “He sensed when a person was feeling bad and came himself.” Monks and laity remember Hierodeacon of the Optina Hermitage Iliodor Gairiyants // Kozelsk

, October 26, 2022,

[2] Testimony of Samuel, the spiritual child of Hierodeacon Iliodor, head of the social charitable foundation “Pokrov”, op. according to Art. “He sensed when a person was feeling bad and came himself.” Monks and laity remember Hierodeacon of the Optina Hermitage Iliodor Gairiyants // Kozelsk

, October 26, 2022,

Hierodeacon Iliodor: “In the next world the first question will be: “Were you a man on earth?”

“Rejoice, good Goalkeeper, who opens the doors of heaven to the faithful!” – who doesn’t remember his booming tunes. Even the most unsinging ones sang next to him. And then, long after the akathists, initiated everywhere by Father Iliodor, the soul sang and rejoiced.

This is the apostle of such joyful, ringing with this gospel, the main human happiness - to be with God, under the Protection of the Most Holy Theotokos. It was on the Iverskaya Goalkeeper that the Mother of God let him into the heavenly abodes. Just like 40 days fall on the Entry into the Temple of the Most Holy Theotokos - the patronal feast of the Entrance of the Optina Hermitage.

Father Iliodor bequeathed to us: “Everyone must definitely use the time that the Lord gives to each person: 24 hours a day!” Including on vacation. We publish his words, written down once over a cup of tea.

When does a person feel good?

Often a person searches for himself for a long time. So I wandered through life until I was 40: I bumped here, here... And then the Lord brought me to the Lavra. And I understood everything! Well, once I understand, that’s it, go ahead! So I accepted monasticism. I stayed there, in the monastery. I began to pray as expected. This is where the secrets and wisdom of our existence and relationships with God began to be revealed. Our whole life is in the hands of God. Establishing a relationship with God is all we need. Everything else will be added (cf. Matt. 6:33).

Above the intelligent there are the intelligent, above the intelligent there are the wise, above the wise there are the wise, and above the wise there is holy simplicity. But this is already aerobatics. With God, everything is generally simple. “Where it’s simple, there are a hundred angels, where it’s sophisticated, there’s not a single one,” as our Father Ambrose of Optinsky said. It is we, people, who complicate everything for ourselves. “God does not create the cross for man. And no matter how heavy the cross may be for another person, which he bears in life, yet the tree from which it is made always grows on the soil of his heart,” he instructed, and, pointing to his heart, he would add: “The tree at the issue of the waters.” , the waters are seething there,” which means passions. This is the source of all our troubles.

What is holiness? Outwardly, these people are modest, simple, kind, accessible, spontaneous, friendly, and kind. If a person is not angry with anyone, consider him a saint. If he doesn’t judge anyone, he doesn’t condemn anyone. “To live is not to bother, not to judge anyone, not to annoy anyone, and my respect to everyone,” - who doesn’t know these words of Father Ambrose? Do not seek honor or glory for yourself. And be lenient and attentive to everyone. Love everyone... Just start doing this, and you will already have peace in your soul. If you don’t have love, then do things of love, even without love, and God, seeing your desire and suffering, will give love to your heart, as the Optina elders instruct.

After all, when does a person feel good? Not when he is loved, but when he himself loves. Then everything is fine for him: the weather is beautiful, and the people around are all so wonderful... And when he doesn’t love, everything is wrong for him, it’s hard, unbearable. That is why the Lord gives the commandment: “Let you love one another” (John 13:34).

Without love nothing makes sense

They say: the world will perish when love runs out. Nothing without love. Why will the world collapse? Because without love nothing makes sense. If there is no love, then many disasters can begin in order to at least bring people to their senses. Everything is in the will of God. There were also prophecies, and if people repented, the Lord changed his mind. If there had been 10 righteous people in Sodom and Gomorrah, at least five for each city, those who simply repented, God would not have destroyed these cities (Gen. 18:32)!

We all need to make sure to use the time that the Lord gives to each person, namely: 24 hours a day! Exactly as much is given to the Patriarch and to anyone. This is how you arrange it, so it will be. As people say: every person is the builder of his own happiness and unhappiness. It is necessary that it is not circumstances that dispose him, but that he controls the circumstances. And then it begins: habit is second nature, the wife is a fool... These are all excuses.

A person has three main responsibilities: if he is a family member, then a family. Then work - a man cannot live without work, women have their own worries: children, home. And third - the Church. That is, the Church, of course, should be a priority. When God comes first, everything else falls into place. But this is necessary so that a person still matures before this. And then for many, their family falls out of sight... “But he works and works, but we don’t see him at home,” every now and then from all sides. And who needs it then, such a life?

We need to rest, because the Lord commanded and by His example sanctified not only six days of labor, but also the seventh of rest (St. Nicholas of Serbia wrote well about this). The commandments must be fulfilled. But rest is also not an end in itself, as some people think. Now there are a lot of distortions: either workaholism, or wasting one’s life... This is due to nonsense. Because if there is no love in life, it is truly meaningless.

What is the demand from unchurched people? They don't understand the essence of life. But when Christians move away from the Church, that’s a problem. “A servant who knows the will of his master, and neither prepares nor does according to his will, will suffer many beatings” (Luke 12:47). And how they just don’t justify themselves: “Yes, we couldn’t then, but the fact that we’re late now is nothing... The Lord will forgive.” And then - pain, sorrow.

Live to prepare for eternity

“In sorrows, you pray to God, and they will go away, but you can’t drive away the illness with a stick,” St. Ambrose said. Healing is often given to strengthen faith. I know such a Hope. She is from Finland herself. Got sick with sarcoma. The doctors gave her a month or two to live. She sold everything she had and went to holy places. She prayed at the relics, venerated shrines and miraculous images, began to lead a Christian lifestyle, help others, confessed, received communion, and received unction. Then, after unction, she was not lazy, anointing herself with this oil every day, and with other oils consecrated from holy relics and icons. I drank holy water, did not start the day without a prosphora, and took a dip in holy springs. I became a believer. She had no time for skepticism: they say, why is all this necessary... But the doctors could not believe it:

-Where are you being treated?

- And I have holy oil, holy water, prosphora... - that’s how she answered directly.

- Yes?! Well... - the doctors looked at each other.

But she lived another 12 years! And these dozen more years were enough for her to prepare for eternity. She left this world very simply and easily. To be saved, as the Monk Ambrose said, is not difficult, but wise. It’s worse when illnesses are already sent to believers...

Will God really not stop?

There are so many things a person can do in life. But to turn to God - well, no way! And it's all about pride. Well, how? It was the Soviet government that perverted man in such a way. And when such atheists climb into power even now, watch out!

Listen to Zyuganov: I will give you this, I will provide this for you... And who exactly are you?! Did you create natural resources? We already know, we’ve been through what and how you know how to promise: a bright future, etc. They gave it so much that it still stutters. Tomorrow they will carry out any such promiser feet first, that’s all your distribution of gifts. The world has seen such people: Hitler, Stalin, and Lenin... and there is none of them.

And God is, was and will be - that’s the whole axiom. He is the One Almighty.

But power spoils a person, a weak person. You should take an example from the Optina elders: how meek they were always. The mighty of this world obeyed them, but the elders themselves remained humble. And the communists declared the Optina elders “enemies of the people.” And who turned out to be the enemy in the end?

In our country, no matter how you turn it, until we condemn all the evil that happened in the country in the 20th century, all these crimes committed by commies against the people, until we remove all these idols around the country from their pedestals, remove the names of the executioners -terrorists from the names of streets, squares, subways, libraries, etc. - what kind of revival do we need? And now what - a car is not a car, a resort is not a resort... Where are we going? Will God really not stop? It won't last long. The same thing happened before the revolution. Her legacy has not yet been dealt with...

They walk on God's earth, breathe God's air, bask in God's sun... And glorify this idol? Do they go to venerate his corpse in the Mausoleum and lay wreaths? “But, I’m getting a pension...” What kind of pension do you need if this idol of yours has rotted millions of people? What kind of pension do you want, watered with their blood?

They are still beginning to defend this ideology. “Do you even know what communism is in action?” - I ask such a well-fed gentleman, well dressed. “Bright future,” he answers. And he’s not ashamed yet.

Ours is peaceful. Well, a person does not believe in God and does not believe. Not given to him. What will you take from him? It’s like asking a communist: “Don’t you believe in God?” - "I do not believe". - “Are you a communist?” - “Yes, a communist.” - “Well, God grant you 1000 years of health. And I believe."

Well, it would seem, so what next? But no: I don’t believe it myself, and I’ll knock the faith out of you. If you believe, our Felix Edmundovich will shoot you. You are an “enemy of the people.”

“Well, okay,” I remember asking the communists, “do you believe?” - “We don’t believe, we have our own ideals.” - "Yes of course. Faith is a person's free choice. So, should we force children to believe in God?” - "No". - “And adults?” - "Of course not". - “But you can force people not to believe?!” I look, they are blushing... “Oh, what are you,” I think, “There is no God, but that means you exist, right?” There is no use talking to them.

Love each and every one

We Christians must always remain steadfast in the image of Christ. No matter what they did to the Lord, no matter how they betrayed Him or mocked Him, He continued to love each and every one. And the guilty will be punished. They punish themselves. And we should not respond to evil with evil. Even more than that, they are called to feel sorry for these poor fellows. They didn't get the main thing. All the new martyrs, who were mocked and shot, prayed for the executioners: “They do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34).

Even Tsar Nicholas asked: tell them not to take revenge on anyone for me... “He has forgiven everyone and is praying for everyone, and so that they do not take revenge for themselves, and so that they remember that the evil that is now in the world will be even stronger, but that not evil will conquer evil, but only love...” - Grand Duchess Olga conveyed... This is the height! And all this anger and hatred is, of course, a disease. If a person denies God, does not see the sun, does not admire the beauty of the sky, nature, he does not have kindred feelings, tenderness towards children, even strangers... The communists left children without parents, or drove everyone out into the cold, or took them to Siberia without things, without food supplies. Women with babies in their arms, old people were dropped off just like that in some vacant lot... If a person doesn’t even have compassion, then what kind of person is he? Worse than cattle.

Still, even predators know how to take pity. How many cases are known when even she-wolves nurse the cubs of some other species of animal, save them, lick them, and feed them with their milk. What can you say about those for whom the laws of all things are invalid? These people are already dead during their lifetime. You can only feel sorry for such people. The saints and elders prayed for them.

Grand Duchess Elizaveta Feodorovna walked and bandaged. I walked around the gates, specifically looking for them... Which of the secular girls and fashionistas who have established their careers is capable of this? The length of the eyelashes, the length of the nails... Although, of course, there are ascetics today, in the same hospital of St. Alexis. There are crusaders.

The hopeless and the ready are only taken from here

Remember how the Monk Macarius sent his disciple ahead? He met the priest, reprimanded him properly, and the pagan beat this florid neophyte. And the elder walked behind him and took pity on this lost one... He greeted the hardworking man, and he was touched. He admitted that he had beaten the one who had just called him a “demon”... Then Saint Macarius saw his disciple...

All the same, we humans are all creations of God. If the Lord prolongs someone else’s life, it means that the possibility of salvation is not yet closed for this person. All those who are hopeless or already ready (if they do not have a special assignment here) are taken away from here only this way. Our whole life is in the hands of God.

We are all human. This is how we need to treat each other as human beings. This is the principle of coexistence. At least this is how we build a society. Do not deceive, do not steal, do not kill each other - this is universal human ethics. And the Lord simply stated everything: what you do not wish for yourself, do not do to another - that’s all (Matthew 7:12). Loving everyone is for the perfect.

But we, Christians, are called to perfection (cf. Matt. 5:48). We are “the light of the world” (Matt. 5:14). Just as the sun shines on everyone, regardless of whether he is good or evil, we too must try to do good to everyone. We cannot pray together with heterodox people, people of other faiths: this is a crime against faith, but we can and should do good to everyone: Muslims, Catholics, Jews, atheists, and communists. Treat everyone simply as a human being.

Birth into eternity and the first cry of the soul

When each of us reaches the next world, the first question will be: were you a human being on earth? “The first commandment is to be human.” This is what they will ask us about first of all, it seems to me. When the soul enters the region of eternity, it sees the Creator, and the first thing that comes out of it is: “Lord, have mercy!” You believed there during your life, you didn’t believe, you just cry out to Christ... When a child is born, a cry spontaneously bursts out from him - he screams! This is exactly the same with the soul, and she is a Christian.

And so she screams and screams: “Lord, have mercy!” And in response - this is all set out in the Gospel: have you had mercy on others? Did you drink, feed, shelter, visit, help in trouble? Even if you are a Samaritan, your faith is somehow wrong, but could you do this?

So, during the Great Patriotic War, for example, a Muslim, risking himself, pulled his comrades out of the battlefield one after another, crawled after the next and blew himself up. Did he die “not for his own friends”? Did you not fulfill the commandment? And if you are Orthodox, you had to wait for blessings in some emergency situation... Which of you turned out to be a Christian?

The Lord will ask us first of all HUMANITY. In second place will be the question of faith. He will too. But the first thing will be: humanity. Why? Because we are human.

Look, sometimes a dog comes up: “Arrrrr” - “Stay there.” She ate, but wouldn’t eat it all, and walked away. And then another dog comes up, also eats, but not more than what it can eat: it has picked up its own and leaves. This is in dogs. And a man who knows what he has, he is not hungry: he has for today, and for tomorrow, and for decades to come... And he still grabs and grabs, rows and rows for himself. Still, it is also written in the Gospel: “Mad! This very night they will take your soul from you: and what I have prepared for you, to whom will they be?” (Luke 12:20).

Even in the life of one person, all sorts of cataclysms happen: now you are on the crest of a wave, and the next moment what will happen to you? Did you think about others when you yourself had plenty of everything? Today there is calm, and tomorrow there is a storm...

Don't people read fairy tales? Don't they know history?

We need to return to the traditional way of life. When there is harmony in the family, there is no need for treasure. A woman needs to be put in her place. How long ago did you have children? Yes, because there was humility. And the Bolsheviks, with their emancipation, corrupted women. And it began: “I don’t want to be a pillar noblewoman, but I want to be a free queen...” - “I don’t want to be a free queen, I want to be the mistress of the sea...”. Are all the men chasing goldfish?

Behold, a woman will be saved by bearing children (cf. 1 Tim. 2:15). And where are they, these children?

These are all links in one chain: atheism leads to extinction. Who was the first in human history to legalize abortion? Lenin. In our country. The nation is now dying out, and they are paying tribute to him?

This is all from the same post-revolutionary years: “down with shame” and all that. There is no God, do what you want. “Marry” that one, you don’t like it – this one, the third one will grow up. Same-sex perversions. Freedom, everything is possible. Chill out Vasya.

“What, is your mom yelling at you? Did dad say something wrong? Call me. Juvenile justice is always yours.” Pavlik Morozovs – we’ve already been through this!

Don't people read fairy tales? Don't they know history? If they don’t care about the Gospel, then at least they should know something? Some poems:

The little son came to his father and the little one asked: “What is good?” And what is bad?

Well, there must be some kind of idea about good and evil? It’s like when you come to the zone, and there are prisoners: “Oh, they didn’t teach us any commandments... We didn’t go to Church...” - “Well, so what now? - I ask. – Did you have to steal? Kill? Why are you in jail? Here they look, the conversation went so straight, they don’t evade: “For crimes,” they answer. “And why did you do it? Because you didn’t have the Gospel?!” They are silent and blink. “Are you a man or what? Do you have a conscience?” Nods.

“Yes, everything is fine with us! God bless! But how is it there in the world?..”

Godless ideology, of course, gives rise to crime - there is nothing to say here. The king was killed, and this is the head of the people. The church was ruined, and this is the soul of the people. They cut off the head, the soul is gone - that’s why the body stinks. It's like that. That’s why it’s funny to me when they ask: “Why did you leave the world and go to a monastery?” What do you think I left there? Longing and sadness. It’s impossible to watch without tears: “Sasha! Vasya. Great! Come on?" - “I’m nothing. What about you? - “I’m okay too.” - "Come on!" - "Come on!" - “Hello, Masha, hello! What about you? - “I’m nothing.” - “I’m okay too.” - "Come on!" - "Come on!" And so for the hundred and first time? Cinema, wine, dominoes? Mat-rewind. Longing and sadness... I call them all, in the world, “martyrs”.

You came to the monastery, and everything is fine with you. “Ba-ty-shka! How are you there?" - “Yes, everything is fine with us! God bless! But how is it there in the world?..” - “Oh, we came to you in Optina. Only for two days. We're leaving now. We urgently need to pack our things. Run already. How good it is here in Optina. How nice...” - “Well, stay.” - “No, no, no, we’re in a hurry. We have things to do." Yes, I know your affairs! You leave: business, business, - and then you return with eyes like a saucer: in business... - God forbid!

May God grant repentance.

Archdeacon Iliodor (Gariyants) Recorded by Olga Orlova

October 26, 2022

Pravoslavie.ru

If someone loves you, you can move on with your life

In memory of Hierodeacon Iliodor (Gairian)

This year, at the Entry into the Temple of the Most Holy Theotokos in the Optina Hermitage, they not only celebrated the patronal feast, but also especially commemorated her monk, Hierodeacon Iliodor (Gairian), who had recently reposed in the Lord. 30 years ago on this day, the blessed Patriarch Alexy II ordained him there as a deacon. So, on the 40th day of his death, the soul of this monk appeared before the Lord precisely on that date in the church calendar when it dedicated itself to serving His Church. Father Iliodor was also remembered at the Sretensky Monastery by Mother Lyubov Vyacheslavovna Shevchuk, an employee of the seminary library, and her children. One of her sons, John, is a novice of the monastery, the other, Nikolai, studies at Sretensky Seminary.

“He was our mother. And to all of us"

Mother Love:

– Father Iliodor, when we first met him, was just a bonfire of love. Love that burns him first of all. Then he learned to be more restrained - this volcano in him seemed to subside a little. It was good. First of all, it gave him more internal freedom. Otherwise, it was so responsive that it could have been used maliciously. Trusting like a child. It never even occurred to him that someone could deceive him.

I remember once my husband was slandered in front of my father Iliodor, and he himself was so direct and ardent that he could not hide anything like that in his soul, harbor a grudge: only Alexey came to the door, and he immediately told him everything... He stands - in general can't understand what's what.

And Father Iliodor disperses more and more... Then Father Andrei Nikolaev ran up to the house in response to the noise, and it was so huge - then their whole family with Mother Ksenia and their children will be killed and burned... And then Father Andrei trampled... And he decided, that it’s better not to interfere: even he doesn’t have the strength to overcome this flame. It's worth praying. I listened: and silence! Lo and behold: let’s go hug each other and read an akathist to the Mother of God.

Then Father Andrei told me this:

- You know, if there is at least one person in the world who loves you as much as Father Iliodor... You can give your life for it!

Father Iliodor knew how to love devotedly, deeply, somehow in a kindred way. Vanya was recently asked:

-Who was he to you?

The son was even confused:

- This is a friend of our family. A very close person to us. We children knew from a very young age: there was Father Iliodor, and that said it all. He helps mom and dad...” and then suddenly generalized: “He was our mother.” And for all of us.

This is true.

Iliodor's cassocks from the bishop's shoulder and cassock, which appeared in time

In Optina.
Behind Father Iliodor is Vanya Shevchuk, to the right of Father Iliodor is Father Anthony. When my husband, for example, was ordained as a deacon, we couldn’t even buy anything. There was no money even for a cassock. A hieromonk he knew from the Nilova Hermitage gave him his novice cassock, but it was too small for Alexei: the sleeves were short, the hem looked like it had been shot, the chest was wide open. He arrives in Optina, goes - he’s not himself: but he’s wearing a cassock! His father Iliodor meets him... - Oh! But-o-rmal! – he stared at him and turned him this way and that. – Why are you like a clown?!

– ?

- Let's go to!

He brings his father to his cell.

“Let’s have some tea, shall we?” and Father Iliodor himself prays, thinks about something, thinks about it... So he was usually completely with his interlocutor.

Knock knock on the door. Mother seamstress appeared on the threshold and said:

- Did you order?

Father Iliodor jumped up, quickly dressed up, and looked so happy!

- That's it, thank you! – smiles back at her.

She simply blushed with joy. He also deliberately hangs new clothes away in the closet: they say, for special occasions - “This cassock turned out great!”

He will always give something else to a person - he will not let go empty-handed. As soon as the door slammed:

- Let's try it on! – Father Iliodor immediately rushed to the locker.

- What are you talking about?! – our dad began to resist. - How do you mean “try it on”? They've sewn it for you!

- Try it on! “I say,” the owner of the cell hovered over him.

- Yah…

– Are you pushing away the monk’s hand or something? Through a monk, God Himself gives this to you!!!

“Try on the cassock! – Father Iliodor loomed over his husband. “Through the monk, God Himself gives this to you!!!”

The father dived into this cassock and - oh, miracle: the length was just right, and the sleeves were in place.

- Well, what do I need a new cassock for? – Father Iliodor assures him. - I am a monk, everything should rot on me. Where do I need new cassocks? Show off, or what?! You still need a cassock! So... - he was already rummaging in the closet again, once - and something black darted out again. - Here, the bishop gave it to me. Let's put it on!

This is how our father, the Iliodorovs, had the first cassock and the first cassock from the bishop’s shoulder. Father Iliodor also supplied all the benches.

Mother's packages and Epiphany cake

In Optina.
On the far right is Father Iliodor, on the left is Kolya Shevchuk. And then the time was poverty and poverty. Right down to T-shirts and trousers, Father Iliodor got everything for Alexey. Where he sees some warm shoes of his size - he remembers how he shifted from foot to foot, warming up - he will immediately store it and put it aside. Will pass it on through someone. We open the box: new shoes, and inside one there are also socks with a brush, and in the other there is a tube of cream for caring for the new clothes!! He himself was very zealous. And he unobtrusively taught others such frugality and care. It was said by Abba Dorotheus that one must preserve one’s conscience not only towards God and people, but even towards every thing. You perceive what you receive from monastic hands as a sacred gift. And the parcel itself was, as always, as if packed by its own mother - a complete set! Just as a mother gathers a child so that he does not need anything, so he does the same.

I remember we arrived from our parish in Optina by minibus. We had Sasha behind the wheel - a good guy, but an unbeliever. And so Father Iliodor asks him:

- Listen, how are you carrying people, but you yourself are not baptized, huh? Well, what if there is some kind of accident? Is it possible to do this? It's kind of irresponsible.

Sasha listened to him, listened. And we were there for three days. And then he agreed to be baptized. And Father Iliodor also tells him:

- And I’ll bake you a pie.

Sasha was baptized in the evening, then the next day at Liturgy he was given communion, and then Father Iliodor greeted him with a cake. And what a delicious pie it was! Sasha even shed tears.

“Mom has never taken such care of me,” he said.

And Father Iliodor even then directly looked after him. Just mom.

The fruits of catechesis, or How Father Iliodor fought when it was necessary

I remember Alexei, my husband, had just been ordained to the priesthood, we arrived in Optina, Father Iliodor met us and immediately:

- Lesh! Went!

And then I was pregnant again - already with twins. She just moved somewhere to the side, and there was no trace of them. All I see is Father Iliodor running back:

- ABOUT! Lyuban! I got Lesha here. Now 80 people will be baptized. Let's go have a look!

So most likely these people were from those whom Father Iliodor catechized! Hundreds of people were baptized there then.

And now he leads me to the temple at the pilgrimage hotel. I walk in and my father is already getting ready there; he always had a baptismal box with him... Father Iliodor sits me down on a chair:

-Are you comfortable here? - asks. - I’ll bring the milk now. Do you want a cutlet?

“What kind of cutlets are in the temple?!” - Think.

- Come on! - he caught my reaction, and the cutlets in the monastery are fish. - I’ll bring you some milk now. More buns. Oh, you’re probably tired... You still need to eat the cottage cheese, and that’s how she treats you like a mother.

Although, if necessary, he could be quite militant. Once a man at the church was swearing, so Father Iliodor, who walked everywhere with a large cross:

“Listen,” he thundered in his direction, “now I’m going to bless you…” he concentrated... “and your tongue will fall off!” - Father Iliodor said abruptly, and he abruptly fell silent.

Once the priest stopped him with a cross. I don’t know, maybe later this fellow was among those baptized...

“Give me five! Let’s go eat some prosphora!”

Kolya and I once came to Optina; our circumstances were difficult at the time, and my son was very sad. And Father Iliodor meets him:

- ABOUT! Kolyan! Give me five! Let's go eat some prosphora! - and this is how she tries to cheer him up in every possible way.

The main thing is that there is no despondency. All our saints first of all warned against this: Father Seraphim of Sarov, and Venerable Ambrose of Optina.

- Yeah? Went? - he looks straight into your eyes, and he himself has such a sparkle of love. - Went!!

Not only did he find an approach to every person, but he had great love! She hugged everyone. Suddenly it warmed up. There was some kind of tenderness in him. You tell him something sincere, and he already blossoms!

Not only did he find an approach to every person, but he had great love! She hugged everyone

Once a priest we knew went to Optina, but I couldn’t go then, but gave Father Iliodor a note. So he calls me:

“We read it and just cried.” We cried. We burst into tears.

He suddenly started telling me:

- I kept thinking: you will come - Lesha with Lyuba, and with you not only children, but also parishioners around, and between everyone there is love, respect, no one offends anyone... And here I am walking next to the edge and am proud of all of you.

That's how he was - he completely dissolved in people. I didn’t notice anything good about myself, I was a slave to everyone (cf. Matt. 20: 26–27). But he could be happy for others, even proud.

Recently Kolya was given the medal of St. Nicholas of Japan. And the patriarchal letter. And Kolya said to me:

- Oh, mom! They gave me a medal, but Father Iliodor did not...

How Father Iliodor rejoiced when Kolya entered the master’s program at Sretensky Seminary! I went and showed it to everyone:

- Academician! Kolya. Lyubin's son.

The Joy of the Giver

Just now Kolya wrote about Father Iliodor:

“Of course, a lot can be said about Father Iliodor. I will try to outline the general impression. First of all, when he came to Father Iliodor, he always asked if I was hungry. Although, no matter what you answer, at least give him some tea. We often went to his cell, where he collected gifts for me and my whole family. When I remember I went with Father Iliodor, I often carried his black bag, it usually contained candy, incense, coal, printouts with the chant “Agni Parfene”, which he distributed to everyone. I once heard someone say that Father Iliodor has a special joy - “the joy of the giver” - I think this is an accurate expression in relation to him.

I didn’t ask him much, I didn’t ask for advice. But when I was next to him, I always felt his care and at the same time felt great shame. It’s a shame that I pray and work so little when I have such an example before my eyes.

Father Iliodor had an incredibly living faith, he had such reverence towards people! When he exhorted, it was also threatening. But this is only from complete love. It was impossible not to feel it. I saw how big, huge men turned gray and red when Father Iliodor asked them:

- Why are you behaving like this? How dare you when the Mother of God is looking at you?! What a scoundrel!!!

“Why are you behaving like this? How dare you when the Mother of God is looking at you?!” - he scolded. But he always scolded me with love

But he always scolded everyone with love. It is from such scoldings that people change.

With power he defended those who were offended. He believed that it was necessary to stand up for workers, labor women, monks, no matter who oppressed them. Weak means protect.

I think he left me - for the rest of my life - with parting words about how to believe so vividly that you should never be afraid of anyone or anything. Do not be afraid to waste yourself - absolutely without reserve in love for God and neighbor. He often repeated: “It’s better to wear out than to rust.”

“Mary in the family is a special blessing to the family,” or Twins for obedience

Mother Love:

– During our second pregnancy, we didn’t yet know who would be born (and I was never particularly interested in this - for centuries people relied on the will of God: who God would send), and so our father went to Optina Pustyn and told Father Iliodor there:

- We are waiting for an addition. How to name? Well, name it!

“If a son is born, name him Nicholas,” he answers (he greatly revered St. Nicholas), “and if it’s a girl, then Mary.”

How he loved the Mother of God! In Russia, it is not customary to name children in honor of the Mother of God and give Her name at Baptism, although in Greece this is possible. But Father Iliodor said - at least to those with many children - that there must be a Maria in the family. It is clear that the heavenly patroness will be one of the saints, but still: “Mary in the family is a special blessing to the family.” He kept remembering his grandmother Maria, saying: “She begged for our whole family.”

Father Iliodor said: there must be Maria in the family

And then we had twins! Nikolai and Maria!

- Well, they listened, they obeyed! – Father Iliodor then rejoiced.

And he also warned me: when you give birth, let me know right away - we’ll pray. I gave birth, immediately to my husband:

- Telegraph to Optina!

-What are you doing?! - he insisted. – Send a telegram to the monastery: the children were born, everything is fine?!... That’s normal, right? Then we’ll come sometime, we’ll say.

So I refused: I won’t go and that’s it. And the first thing I did when I left the maternity hospital was rush to the post office and sent Father Iliodor a telegram: “Kolya and Masha were born. We ask for prayers." Later, many people told me how Father Iliodor rushed around the monastery with this dispatch:

- No, how obedient they are! I told them: if it’s a boy, you’ll name it Nikolai, if it’s a girl, Maria, then they took it and gave birth to Kolya and Masha!

Monks and nuns may not read this chapter

Masha is also the goddaughter of Father Iliodor. Once they were with one of the nuns, sitting at the table, and for Masha, Father Iliodor (his name is translated: the gift of the sun) is like a ray of sunshine, he himself, by the way, is “a ray of sunshine - Father Elijah (from the Greek. : sun)" called.

And then the nun intimidated Masha: why is she staring at the monk like that? And Masha assured her no matter how much that he gave her both a name and a godfather... But no matter: it’s impossible, that’s all! And then Father Iliodor showed up... He sat down at the table and sat Masha down next to him. He puts candy on her. He pours some tea. He hugged me... And Father Iliodor also wore shoes on his bare feet in winter, so that when he came to visit someone, he was barefoot. So he felt under the table that Masha’s feet were cold.

- Oh! Why are your feet frozen?!! - this was the highlight of the program for the nun, who did not know what to do with herself... - Come on, put your feet on mine, - he immediately commands, - you’ll warm up...

And he himself was like a heat generator - despite the fact that even in severe frosts he plunged into the source.

Masha later confessed to Father Iliodor how she was being reprimanded for his warmth... He was so dumbfounded that something like: “You will listen to all sorts of nonsense,” burst out from him. Will cover the cassock with a wing:

- Let's go to the Church of the Mother of God to read the akathist!

Masha says:

- When he read these akathists - and he served them around the clock, even at night - and here you are standing in this unsteady darkness and it’s as if you yourself are completely filled with light. And how we all sing together in chorus at the end: “My Queen is the best,” and as if the whole world has already been embraced by this Light, as if we were all already in Paradise. Moreover, Father Iliodor never stood still with his eyes raised up, he could notice something in a person, some kind of movement of the soul, rush to him, ask what and how - while someone else was there, to whom he entrusted, kontakion is reading. Others were embarrassed: they say, we are here for an akathist (for once) gathered, and the priest is talking... But we deigned to do this, but for him, this is his ordinary, unceasing life! He was amazingly organic during prayer. Not constrained like those who do not live this experience. He prayed with all his heart, but he didn’t leave us either... You arrive, I remember, in Optina, and after the service you wait at the salt. The priest comes out of the altar: “Oh! Kolya and Masha have arrived! Twins! My…".

When he read akathists to the Mother of God - and he served them around the clock, even at night - you seemed to be filled with light

Pain that he didn't cause

Mother Love:

- So Masha began to talk and burst into tears. Also, when Father Iliodor just died, she simply sobbed and then wrote:

“There was a man... and then he was gone. And you want to say so much that you just stand there, look into yourself and remain silent. You close yourself off from the pain. At first it stuns you, pierces you quickly and strongly, you cry out loud like a child, shuddering and embarrassed. And then it seems that there are no more tears. Doesn't hurt or ache. But it becomes empty. Imagine having a human chair in your shower. He dies, and emptiness takes his place. A very painful emptiness pulsating with darkness. And you just can't get used to it.

All day long the thought is in my head: “he left, but we stayed.”

That's why we cry so much. We cry for ourselves, for the orphaned.

I want to jump up and run away. And run for a long, long time. Just run. Without thinking.

Or fall asleep. Under a warm blanket, covering your head. Sleep until spring. Until the sun.

But you can’t hide from pain. There is a lot of it in the world. “Pain loves to be felt.”

The only pain he caused me was his death."

“I am in honor of the monastery!”

Mother Love:

“He and Kolya constantly went to see Father Iliodor in Optina. They get up after the Liturgy and wait at the solea. Although there were usually a lot of people waiting for him. Somehow a guy approaches them:

- Guys, are you a guy and a girl? Or husband and wife? Or brother and sister?

“Brother and sister,” Kolya answers.

“That’s what I see: you, like communicating vessels, understand each other too well.” Let’s get to know each other,” he extends his hand, calling his name, and mine at the same time:

- Nikolai - Maria.

- So you are Kolya-Masha?! – he almost jumped.

Who among those close to Father Iliodor did not know their story!

Father Iliodor also named our youngest son Vanya. Vanya himself usually uses irony when we remember... But that’s how it happened. I was surprised from the very beginning: at that time, from the very beginning, Father Iliodor did not consider the option of a girl at all.

- And what? - he suddenly says. - There we have the monastery of John the Baptist. Let's call him Vanka.

Later I told Vanyukha how I grew up. Now that we are talking with the guys about who is named after whom, in memory of which saint...

- I am in honor of the monastery! - he announces.

He just LOVES – that’s all!

Masha cried, she can tell something again.

Masha says:

– I had serious health problems as a teenager; When Father Iliodor found out, he was so worried that, not knowing how to take part in this, suddenly, out of the blue, from the feelings overwhelming him: “Let him eat cherries!!!” - blesses. We began to buy cherries in all seriousness, I ate them, but, as I understand it, it’s not about the cherries - it’s just that we are being obedient, and Father Iliodor was praying. Although it was then that I consciously, with effort, as it is said: “with all my strength” (Matthew 22:37), began to pray. I read akathists every day. When I turned 18, everything just went away. Sometimes, as you know, some health temptations are allowed in order to protect a person from something.

(Crying again.)

Here was a man who loved me. Not for anything. But he simply loved. He didn’t have to prove that you were good for him to love you. He just LOVES you – that’s all!

He simply testified to love with his whole life

Mother Love:

“I remember once we had a bus going from the church to the Trinity-Sergius Lavra. Summer, hot. The bus is unbearably stuffy. I thought: I will die there. And along the way the connection still disappears. We already arrive in Sergiev Posad, I see: I have 12 (!) missed calls. I immediately type:

- Where are you? What it is?! Where did you go? I don't find a place for myself here. What's happening to you there?! - this infinitely familiar voice on the phone!

I, of course, have tears in my eyes. And somehow all this trouble and burden recede. If someone loves you, you can move on with your life.

- We’re approaching the Lavra, father...

- You are not answering. I was wondering if something had happened...

- Father, what an accident! The bus is big, what will happen to it?..

- It’s so hot! Where did you go in this hot sun?! Do you even have air conditioning in the cabin?

- No…

That's how he was - he simply surrounded you with care. Then I began to pray for the heat to subside! Can you imagine? This “Solar Gift” knew how to negotiate with His Own.

He called often.

- Love, how are you? Tell me about the guys. What does Mashenka need? What does she like? A jacket, maybe? What size is she now? Oh, listen, maybe I’d better transfer you some money now, and you can buy it for her? How is Kolya doing? etc.

Then he will send money and: Kolya this, Vanya this, Anya this, Masha this. So he will translate as much more as there is left over and above his orders. He loved so much that he provided freedom. Never taught anything. He simply testified to love throughout his life.

He always asked about something everyday, he was interested in everything, he cared about everything. In all the difficult circumstances of life, he was always by your side. He will meet you, wipe your tearful pug with his beard, hug you, and kiss you on the top of your head. It’s like Mashenka said:

– LOVES – that’s all!

What else does? But love is forever.

Recorded by
Olga Orlova

FATHER ILIODOR HAD ONE QUESTION: “HOW HAPPY ARE YOU?”

But serving the Church of Christ is not only waving a censer and proclaiming litanies... Even in the monastery, his all-encompassing love, like sunlight, did not fit. Mother Lyubov Vyacheslavovna Shevchuk, an employee of the Sretensky Seminary library, remembers Father Iliodor, whose children - one, John, is a novice of the Sretensky Monastery, the other, Nikolai, studies here at the seminary, daughters: Anya - the wife of a priest, mother, Masha - an icon painter.

From right to left – Father Iliodor and Mother Lyuba and Father Alexy Shevchuki

There were no other people's children for him. And in general no one was a stranger to him

We met Father Iliodor at the very beginning of the revival of Optina Pustyn, in the late 1980s - early 1990s. There was no lukewarmness in him at all - he was so hot that he sacrificed himself without a trace.

He was so ardent that he sacrificed himself without a trace

In 1992, my eldest daughter Anya was supposed to be born, I was admitted to the maternity hospital in advance - I had health problems. My husband and I were students back then and lived in a dorm. And this is also the time in the country... Our hostel, thanks to Father Iliodor, probably only survived. When the food ran out completely and there was absolutely nothing to eat, someone was sent to the monastery... Our messenger returned with a backpack and string bags. I still remember the lentils - at that time we survived at the expense of these offerings. And here I am in the maternity hospital. I hear someone shouting from the street:

- Lu-yuba! Lu-yuba!

And this is me in Baptism of Love. And so I have a different name. But I got up and went to the window. And - in the white snow, I see someone wandering... A familiar silhouette... “Theophilus!” – you can’t confuse him with anyone! That was the monastic name Father Iliodor had at that time: God-loving. Even then, he walked around everywhere in a cassock, which was, in general, a novelty at the very beginning of our frenzied 1990s. There, in Tver, where we studied at the university, the 4th maternity hospital is right opposite the diocesan administration. But for the first time, the entire medical staff carefully contemplated such a performance...

They were all huddled there on the stairs, staring...

Mother Lyuba Shevchuk with children

And we, women in labor, were not allowed out to see our husbands. It was only possible to approach the window. The situation in society as a whole was harsh: then, in the 1990s, many people began to find themselves on the street because of all sorts of scammers. And in the maternity hospital there were some homeless people: now, she will give birth, and then what?.. And all of this somehow hung heavy with such a leaden atmosphere of uncertainty. Nobody needs anyone... And so...

Fireworks of care, joy and love

Father Iliodor is already entering the corridor!! Wow!!! And it was just some nurse who went to take out the slop and left the door ajar, and he broke through. Like a whirlwind of some sparkling happiness! Fireworks of care, joy and love! Something unprecedented for those walls painted with monochromatic paint... So he also waves his hand to others behind him:

- Guys, come here! We'll freeze our children!

There were no other people's children for him. And in general, no one was a stranger to him: everyone is God’s people, they just make mistakes sometimes, and those who are deeply rooted need to be helped...

And so, the men make their way behind him in single file, looking around like this... The doctors are still silent too. We stared: what's going on here? Just a silent scene.

And Father Iliodor in his cassock and skufiya seemed so fantastic to everyone then that no one could say a word to him. How some other reality burst into our stuffy little world. He is already pouring out gifts from his huge backpack, like Santa Claus - St. Nicholas the Wonderworker.

“This is honey,” he says (and he actually supplied me with honey and red wine throughout that pregnancy; the doctors told me: I needed to increase something in my blood there), and then extracts the gifts of care: “Here, this is a shawl for you so that it was warmer, woolen socks... Father Mikhail and I consecrated a cross, you can put it on the baby... - he conveys, I feel: someone is already there, on the doctor’s stairs, starting to sob...

And at that moment he turns around. And they remain silent and watch, and only someone sobs loudly...

“Lyub, and Lyub...” Father Theophilus was already worried, “and what are they?” Everyone looks at me like that...

“What,” I say, “do you think monks come to the maternity hospital every day?” – I didn’t bother explaining that it wasn’t the monks who gave such care to some of the wives, but then more and more civilians began to appear, they couldn’t wait...

“Oh,” Father Theophilus rushed about directly. - Guys, let's leave!

And suddenly he froze at the door and turned around:

- Love, I would have come to you yesterday! We spent the night here, at the diocesan administration. If only I knew you were here - across the road! I would have been here yesterday! – and stepped with a crunch into the snow.

Missionary landing

And then that year he brought us a whole carload of books. At that time there was no spiritual literature at all. People were hungry for spiritual food. And we distributed these books - among young people, and also to older people, for missionary purposes. And then there were already sectarians everywhere. It was necessary to arm our people with something. There are so many troubles because of all these deviations! We even carried these packages from Father Iliodor to the maternity hospital for the doctors! It was distributed to everyone who was ready to receive this Word of God.

We had a friend there in the dorm - Gerka Mikhailovsky. So he told how everything happened.

Father Iliodor comes with a novice to us in Tver, he himself in a cassock, enters the dorm:

– Where do Lesha and Lyuba live?

The watchman was stunned. He looks like he’s a ghost, and also can’t say anything in response. So Father Iliodor waved to the novice:

- Bring it in!

They moved the books. They are sitting on the windowsill in the common corridor, - Father Iliodor is praying, the novice is dangling his legs, - and here Gerka is walking... She can’t believe her eyes.

- Father Iliodor! What are you doing here?!

He explained to him the purpose of his missionary landing. They moved the books upstairs - half our room was filled up. And the dorm there is large, 12 floors, and so, we provided all of them with catechetical literature.

"How close is Heaven"

Father Iliodor with Elder Eli in Optina Pustyn

And then, I remember, one day a car pulls up, Father Theophilus jumps out, cracks, opens the trunk, and there it is filled to capacity with such glossy calendars. I approached. It was then that the pop gloss began to penetrate into Russia - all sorts of vulgarity corrupting... And here, I see: the Optina brethren killed on Easter 1993... Hieromonk Vasily, Monk Trofim, Monk Ferapont... I almost burst into tears.

“You see,” he says, “we honor those who are far away either in time from us or at a distance.” Ecumenical saints. Or, here, a boy was killed in Chechnya, his head was cut off because he refused to remove the cross (about Zhenya Rodionov - Ed.) - what a reverence among the people. Certainly! Necessary! And we seemed to know our fathers closely, even some of their infirmities - who doesn’t have them? And then I’m serving a memorial service, and they tell me: one’s child was healed here, at their graves, and another’s had something settled through prayers to them. This is all given by faith. And I began to look at everything differently.

He fed everyone, both the birds and the dogs... In general, such a soul pitying everyone

Father Eli also said then:

– See how close Heaven is. We knew the brothers when they lived with us. We saw them at work every day. But now children are named after them.

Father Iliodor then delivered oil from lamps from their graves everywhere, some little books about the brethren. Very many then, having learned about them (just as the experience of the new martyrs converts many), became churchgoers.

To Optina, I remember, and from our university dorm after such missionary forays of Father Iliodor to us, an endless pilgrimage simply began. Father Iliodor invariably took those who were in a hopeless situation financially under the wing of his cassock. She had such wide sleeves that the priest could even carry out some dish from a meal in such a spreader - to feed the hungry.

Although he generally fed everyone who came into his hands: both birds and dogs... In general, such a soul pitying everyone. I wanted everything to be done so that there would be more love in our world.

How Father Iliodor enrolled me, my husband and my son in the womb as “novices”

Kolya and Masha Shevchuki

We got used to him as Theophilus, and then, when he was tonsured into a mantle with the name Iliodor, we were sitting one day, and he suddenly asked:

- Do you know when my name day is?

“Yes, I haven’t thought in this direction yet,” I answer.

– When is your daughter’s birthday?

- December 2nd.

– And my name day is December 2. Do you see what a relationship?! God arranges everything. This is all for a reason.

And he called my children that, one after another. The next time I was pregnant, he responded:

– If a son is born, name him Nicholas (he revered St. Nicholas very much), and if a girl, then Mary.

Novice of the Sretensky Monastery Ioann Shevchuk

So I had both a boy and a girl! Twins! And then we didn’t try to find out or scout anything in advance. What a miracle it was. Father Iliodor later boasted to everyone:

- So they listened - so they obeyed! I tell them: “If a boy is born, name him Nikolai, and if a girl, then Maria,” - that’s how they gave birth to Kolya and Masha!

That’s how he signed me and my husband up as “novices.”

And then she’s already pregnant again, but I see: he’s not considering the option of a girl at all, but right away:

- There we have the monastery of John the Baptist. Let's call him Vanka.

Later I told Vanyukha how I grew up. And now he retells all this ironically, although he himself became a novice, so this is like a revelation-prophecy, consider it given to him from Father Iliodor even before his birth.

So now, when we talk to the children about who is named after whom, novice John reports:

- And I’m in honor of the monastery!

“The main thing is that God believes in you”

I remember we were once in Optina for a liturgy, we were leaving the church, Father Iliodor was with us. The service was long and drawn out... And suddenly some guy, all in dreadlocks, came up to him:

“I’m looking for the meaning of life,” he announces. - Explain to me! I don't believe in God. Prove to me that He exists.

- What do I have to prove to you? – Father Iliodor grinned. – He doesn’t believe in God. There aren't many like that. The main thing is that God believes in you. What are you looking for here? He doesn't believe in God! Why did you bring it here?

“I’m looking for the meaning of life...” he somehow got caught up.

- Meaning of life?!! Do you have a family?

- Yes, wife, three children...

- It's normal! He has three children, and he came here to the monastery, looking for the meaning of life. It gives! Go see your children!

Father Iliodor was very careful that there were no distortions.

“Do you want to live godly?»

I remember we just got married, my husband and I, we came to Optina. And Father Iliodor will immediately find your bearings in any crowd and come up to you with a censer. So that time:

- Love, go over there to the temple of St. Onuphrius of Malsky of Pskov... A new temple has been opened, come and look! – he said and moved on.

I’m standing there, thinking: “When the all-night vigil ends, I’ll go and have a look.” Usually, monks, on the contrary, order: stay in the service, don’t be distracted... And then, I see, he again directs his flying step towards me...

– Did you go to the temple? – stops, smokes, looks around.

- No.

– ?! – stared at me.

- Why go straight during the service?..

- Yes, go during the service.

– Maybe we should wait until it’s over?

- No, go now.

So I went. And there is Father Eli, he was still a schema-abbot, now he is a schema-archimandrite. Father was sick then. “Does not accept anyone,” as we were told upon entering Optina. And then I see: he’s standing at the lectern, confessing to some woman. I gathered myself internally: “Since I came, that means I also need to confess.” I’m not ready myself, but I have to go. She said what she remembered. And the priest listened somehow detachedly, this happened to him: they say, that’s not the point, - and then he said:

– Do you want to live piously?

“Of course,” I agree.

- Let your husband go to serve God.

- And where: to the priesthood or... to monasticism? – I was confused.

- Well, what kind of monasticism?! You got married recently! Of course, let him go to the priesthood.

- But as?

- Well, how? I’m coming to Akathist now, let him meet me and see me off.

How we ended up in monasteries

I return to the temple and tell my husband:

– Father Eli told you to go serve God.

- But as? Where the hell am I going?!

– I don’t know, I’m not an old man. But Father Eli said that he would now come to the altar, so that you would meet him and escort him to the monastery.

That's how it all happened. Soon the priest appeared in the church, he went to the altar, Alexey went to the salt, the priest came out, and somehow the people dispersed, which rarely happened. So Alexey led the priest to the monastery (although it is still unknown who was who) ...

Father Alexander Khoroshilov with Anya

Coming back...

- Well, how?!

- I did not get anything…

- How?

- Well, he says something to me - I don’t hear, he says - I don’t hear, I bow lower and lower, and at the end at the monastery he has already turned and announced: “They don’t throw the cross, they take it off. Remember the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross,” and he left. I don’t know what to do next.

And then, due to some simply miraculous circumstances, the husband was ordained for the Exaltation. Now he serves in the Olginsky monastery in the Volgoverkhovye region (Tver diocese). He is in the women's, and I am in the men's - in Moscow Sretensky, I work in the seminary library.

Our children are all on the church path: John is a novice here, in the Sretensky monastery; Kolya is a seminarian, also here, studying for a master’s degree at Sretensky Seminary (he was recently given the medal of Equal-to-the-Apostles Nicholas of Japan); Anya became a mother, her husband, father Alexander Khoroshilov, is a priest, they have already given birth to two children; Masha is studying to be an icon painter and works in a museum.

So that we all rejoice with the Most Holy

Father Iliodor always had a lit censer in his pocket - ready. He was running around everywhere: not only at the murdered Optina brethren, but also at the grave of Mother Sipporah, he would rush to serve a memorial service, and wherever he happened to be at the icon of the Mother of God, he would arrange an Akathist. He would gather everyone, the people simply sang at his Akathists, so that for another week, or even more, everyone’s souls sang and praised the Most Holy One - they were in such joy that it was as if they were already in heaven. And after the Akathists, everyone will be honored to sing “Agni Parfene”. I also distributed printouts to everyone so that they would not forget to praise and thank the Mother of God, then everything in life would work out!

The people simply sang at his Akathists, so that for another week everyone’s souls sang and praised the Most Holy

Masha, my daughter, remembers that Father Iliodor also served the Akathista to the Mother of God at night. In the temple only the lamps flickered unquenchable, but somehow my soul felt light. And once we all take up “Offering to my Queen” together, there will definitely be no more adversities. Masha was once very ill in her youth, so he told her “to eat cherries,” and he himself prayed for her, although she herself, apparently looking at him, began to read Akathists every day. And she was completely healed; she no longer remembers much about her illness.

Father Iliodor was always attentive to people during these Akathists. He did not go into prayer with his eyes turned to Heaven and did not see or hear anyone or anything. No, he himself came up, was interested in what was in someone’s soul - if he saw: the person “Rejoice!” he sings, but he himself is in some kind of confusion... This confused others: how is it supposed to talk during the Akathist? But the priest lived by these Akathists, he had them endlessly, and in the fact that he did not lose sight of people, he also realized his service to the Church of Christ.

“Reprove a wise man, and he will love you...” (Proverbs 9,

I remember Father Iliodor once threw his jacket over my shoulders - these are natural chains! There, not only this censer lit in the inner pocket burns so much that whether you like it or not, you sober up... But also - a lot of prayer books, an Akathist Book, a missal, and even for the distribution of holy items: butter, some pebbles from holy places, icons and books, plus apples, cookies, baked goods, all kinds of sweets in abundance... I was almost crushed by this whole load - I couldn’t bear it. And he also flew through life with all this heaviness.

And a brother ascending into Heaven is known to be grabbed by the boot and immediately beaten to the ground. There were always some kind of raids on him.

We come, I remember, once to Optina. He comes to meet us... “Father Iliodor...”. He looks majestic, his hair flutters in the wind... And the closer we get, the more it takes our breath away. He’s itching in his felt boots, and the thaw has already begun, and everything is somehow awkward: at first I stared at those wet felt boots of his, as if I was hiding my eyes at the ground, and they had trousers tucked in... Yes, some kind of coat thrown on that didn’t fit... And the wire , I remember, this one was put through a loop, and a button was attached to it...

Father Iliodor in Optina Pustyn

– Father Iliodor... What happened to you?..

- What? Naked monk! Subdivide.

- What happened?

I walked through the monastery, it turns out, and there are monks sitting there, eating chocolate in an intelligent way...

- Brothers, what are you talking about? Do you eat chocolate? Are there any children in your monastery?

“Oh, children?!! In a monastery?!” - Apparently, someone got angry at him and decided to rein him in. Pitch.

At one time, Father Iliodor’s cassock, by the way, was often removed. He violated the Charter. Played the fool. This cannot be packaged into disciplinary clichés.

The highest degree of love is not possession, but service.

But the point is not how externally you fit into some regulations. Others fit in, but what’s the point... But Father Iliodor had many spiritual gifts. This is why the enemy attacks. It does not give rest, it acts both through those who are distant and through those who are closer.

Loved to the point of sacrifice. I could love to such an extent that I could give freedom

He may have acquired something with his ascetic life, but he also had such a talent - enormous - not silver (cf. Matt. 25:27), but simply golden, that no amount of our efforts could get it. Just a surprise from God. THE GIFT OF HUGE LOVE FOR PEOPLE. All-consuming. He has it - somehow, always at the ready - a censer in which the burning ember does not go out. Loved to the point of sacrifice. He could love to such an extent that he could give freedom. Complete freedom! This is the highest degree of love. With self-denial. Not possession, but service. Not falling into some kind of foundation is a tradition by which the Pharisees, it is known, lived (cf. Matt. 15:30), but standing before the Living God. He wasted himself completely. The same wheat of Christ is in the teeth of predators.

“How happy are you?”

Masha once drew an angel in half a turn for Father Iliodor and sent it to him. Otherwise, at Christmas, the kids will stick plasticine figures on him, smack them on some cardboard, and give him as a gift. So he always carried these children’s crafts and drawings, like the greatest shrine, through the entire monastery - as if the angel himself had just appeared to him, or he was contemplating the Incarnation itself: the Lord is still very small - Christ is born, glorify! - descended into the cave of Bethlehem... It’s finished! And Father Iliodor rejoiced.

Although his joy was always so deep that somehow sorrow was felt in it: the Lord appeared, and His people - the Pure, the Holy - would still be crucified...

Even in his joy he did not forget about the sorrow of the world; He didn’t let anyone lose heart even in hardships

Even in joy, he did not forget about the pain of the Most Holy One, about the sorrow of the world; Even in times of hardship, he did not let anyone lose heart. And he knew how to see the great in the simple, and he always took care of the most vital, simply elementary things. His questions were simple:

- What are you eating? What are you wearing now? Do you have a fur coat? Or at least a coat? And the boots? Don't your feet get wet? What about work? How much do you get? Oh, that's not enough. What are your relationships like at work? What?!! Maybe I can find something else?

Father Iliodor always had, in essence, one question: “How happy are you?” - “Are you all right? Tell me." He will listen... “Oh, something’s not all right...”.

They re-catechized her, or what?..

Father Iliodor once rushed past me in Optina:

“Listen, I’m under control,” he quickly handed over something, “here, take it.” We’ll go with you now... We need to visit here.

I see food in bags.

Taxiing the car. He looks worried - a matter of life and death. Praying. We went to a village nearby. There is a young family there. We go in... The unpleasant smell hits me straight in the face, like a backhand... I look around, and the mother who stands up to meet me has a child in her arms - scrofulous... He has staphylococcus. It took my breath away. It’s already at such a stage that he might even die: he’s covered in a rash...

Father Iliodor also looks askance, but his face is blank from emotion, he doesn’t know: how to convince her, what words to choose?...

He unloads the food onto the table, gathers his thoughts and strength, - there are children around, and there are many children, spinning around - they grab, look at who took what, and then they eat somehow greedily, avidly, they begin, clearly hungry...

- The child needs to be treated! – Father Iliodor can no longer hold back his tears, his voice is so trembling, he is trying to find the right intonation.

And as we drove, I prayed, but it was clear that I couldn’t break through some kind of wall... And now:

- No! - she persists. “They’ll take you to the hospital and inject you with antibiotics... It’ll go away on its own.” God will help. I will also sprinkle it with holy water.

And Father Iliodor - with such bitterness:

- Well, why are you torturing him?! What does God send us doctors for? – he didn’t scold, he just tried to convey it with such heartfelt, unbearable pain.

Did someone re-catechize her, or what?..

He is both mom and dad to everyone

And his heart ached for everyone. He was especially touching towards children. Like a quonk, he was ready to take everyone under his protection. I remember it was so cold outside, autumn was already chilly, it was drizzling, a woman was leaving the church...

Like a kvochka, he was ready to take everyone under his protection

Apparently, the baby asked to pee. So she takes off his pants right there and begins to take off his pants: here, they say, pee in the flowerbed... That’s when Father Iliodor attacked her:

- What are you doing?!

- Well, he’s small, can’t he pee in the flowerbed? - she is amazed: they say, it’s still drizzling, and why are you so scrupulous and bashful?

“What are you doing, I ask,” he covers him with a robe from the wind. - You'll catch a cold! Why did God give him to you, so that you could mock him? You won’t be able to treat his kidneys for life!

He always protected all the kids this way, protected women - all the weak.

He is both mom and dad to everyone. More than some mothers, I felt and understood. He admonished me in a fatherly way. He held everything and everyone in his heart. “Be perfect, as your Father in heaven is perfect” (Matthew 5:48).

Iraida, Orthodox Kozel woman:

“Today we are all in tears, we cannot calm down. These are born in one million people. He is fine now, he has gone to the Lord. It's terrible that we were left without him. People probably came to see him from all over the world. He dedicated almost all medical offices, and many institutions too - icons from him hang everywhere. There was no need to ask him for help, he himself came up and asked how things were, if everything was okay. He had an amazing memory; he remembered everyone’s names. Probably because I prayed for everyone. Treated everyone like relatives. For him, we were all family. A crowd of young people followed him; everyone wanted to be closer to him. And how many children he led to faith! He easily entered into conversation with them. The conversation turned into instructions: he will give candy to everyone, an icon, and those who don’t have a cross will go buy it and give it as a gift. The children did not leave his side. Never stayed away from other people's problems. When my son’s car broke down near the monastery, he himself, along with the priests, helped push it. How is it different from others? There was no need to call him in trouble, to invite him, he felt when a person was feeling bad and came himself. As the angel called him. He hardly slept, his legs hurt, and he was still eager to help.”

Prepared by the editors of the newspaper "Kozelsk"

“Nothing came to mind except: “Kozelsk!” Optina! From the memoirs of Hierodeacon Iliodor (Gairian)

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Priest Dmitry Torshin, rector of the Assumption Church in the village of Ozerskoye:

“Father Iliodor led such a life... a truly Christian one, which is an example for all of us. This is the warmth and paternal care that every person who knew Father Iliodor felt. I think everyone who knew him is sure that Iliodor treated him in a special way. Because no one has ever received more love than from him. If we were non-believers, then having received this news... it would be easy... well, to go out the window. But since we are people who know what happens to a person after his death, after he goes to heaven, then along with this sorrow we probably feel the joy that we have a prayer book and intercessor. Well, this is how we turn to St. Nicholas, so we have an intercessor to the Lord - Father Iliodor. And he will provide us with care - probably even more than on earth, because... will not be limited by such concepts as space and time. We are all orphans, but there is a certain joy in this. It's a pity for us that we were left without him.

When I first started serving in the parish, he always called me, worried about me, and was interested in my affairs. Father Iliodor was the only person in my life who could call at 2 am and ask: “Father Dmitry, how are you doing?” Naturally, I say that everything is fine. And he: “How are things, is there anything to eat?” I again: “Yes, everything is fine,” and he told me: “Open the refrigerator, what do you have there?” He forced me to list what I had lying around to make sure we weren’t starving. And so not only with me, he took care of everyone. There were cases when a person had a difficult situation, Father Iliodor came and took care of him like a father.”