In this article we will tell you:
- A woman's contribution to her husband's loss of respect for her
- If the reason is in the husband
- Shows of disrespect
- How to make the right decision
- How can a woman regain her self-respect?
- When does it make sense to fight for a relationship?
- 5 practical tips from psychologists
Respect is a basic need for everyone. And of course, each of us strives to create relationships in which this need will be satisfied. But one of the top requests, especially after the pandemic, that were addressed to a psychologist was: “How to restore respect in a couple?” We talked about this with psychologists.
A woman's contribution to her husband's loss of respect for her
If someone shows us a disrespectful attitude, namely: is rude, violates boundaries, behaves tactlessly, and maybe even humiliates us, this may not be our fault.
In normal human relationships, respect is inherent from the very beginning. If we are wondering where it is our fault that a person does not respect us, we should figure out where “unhealthy wings grow” from such logic.
Maybe we are now in a not entirely “healthy” relationship? Or did someone once upon a time inspire us that we have no value in ourselves? Respect in a relationship (mutual, of course) should always be there. And period!
“We often understand “respect” as “admiration” or “reward,” comments psychologist Leonid Kulik. - When we meet any other person, we encounter Another. It is with a capital letter, as philosophers and psychologists like to write, emphasizing the absolute difference. Even if this is a very close person, and we have a lot in common, he will definitely have sides, actions, opinions that are alien to us. Sometimes radical. And in this he/she is that same Other. In order to be in a relationship and calmly endure our differences, we need respect for the other.
“How can I respect him/her?! Let him earn my respect first!” — the message is fundamentally wrong. Respect is not about admiration or reward for merit. It's about the reality principle. To respect is to reckon with a fact.
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Just as the Other deserves our respect by virtue of his existence, so we ourselves deserve respect. And if we do not regularly receive respect from someone, it seems that he is denying us the reality of our existence. And if we don’t treat someone with respect, we deny the fact of their reality.”
Of course, in long-term relationships there are different situations. Sometimes we behave terribly, we can say all sorts of SUCH things to each other, for which we later become very ashamed. Then we apologize, talk, make peace. This is the norm. It is important that we do not get used to being rude to each other and do not make this style of communication the main one. If we don’t communicate with our husband in the style of: “Hey, you loser, come here!” — we have every chance of success in maintaining respectful relationships. And we repeat once again: we can treat a person differently, even get into a big fight with him. You can destroy a relationship, but continue to treat each other with respect.
Conspiracies to make a wife love her husband
It also happens that it is not the husband, but the wife who becomes cold in marriage first. In such cases, conspiracies can also help. Only now the husband begins to spell objects that his wife uses or they use together.
Wine spell
A conspiracy to make a wife love her husband is made by talking about wine, and then drinking a glass together during a candlelit dinner.
I conjure red wine
I call upon the grapevine
So that the servant of God (name) is as pliable and soft
To crawl and caress only with me
And with others I didn’t bend, but broke
Amen. Amen. Amen.
Cream spell
If your wife uses face cream daily, then add a couple of drops of your sperm to it and mix. And read the following words:
The veil covers, the cream covers the face
The heart of the slave (name) pierces with love
Let a clear face, an open brow
Drives others crazy
And slave (name) only comes to me
Amen.
Conspiracy on a plate
Does your wife spend more time with her friends than with her family? Most likely the problem is with you.
They take the plate your wife ate from, say a text on it, and then the dishes are broken on the threshold of the house. The fragments need to be placed on different sides. Large pieces of the plate can then be collected and thrown away.
I ate, I ate, I didn’t finish, I saw, I ate, I didn’t finish,
I walked and walked, and now sit, sit, eat and finish drinking,
Keep an eye on the little children, Don’t walk around the guests of slave (name),
Stay at home with your husband and welcome him with a delicious dinner.
Candle spell
Read three times on the waxing moon for all 7 days. It is advisable to burn your loved one’s hair on a purple candle. If you don’t have a purple candle, then a regular wax candle will do.
The moon is growing - (name)’s love for me is growing,
The month is getting stronger - (name)’s love for me is getting stronger.
Bath towel spell
If your wife is grumpy, but you still love her, then the following ritual will help. Tie the edge of her bath towel in a knot or make a strong knot on the belt of her robe and say:
A strong knot-knot,
Tie your mouth shut
Servant of God (name),
To become affectionate and pliable,
To greet my husband.
Amen. Amen. Amen.
Shows of disrespect
A family quarrel, even the most heated one, is not the same as a manifestation of disrespect. You can shout, you can even break dishes, but at the same time do not cross the boundaries of a respectful relationship. Do not stop seeing and accepting the other with his otherness. But what then is considered a disrespectful attitude, and how can it manifest itself?
Attention! The following list should not become a guide to categorical self-diagnosis and a call for immediate severance of relationships. This is just a reason to think about whether it’s time to properly sort out the relationship and talk to each other.
The main thing is to act!
As soon as you start thinking about how to teach your husband a lesson for disrespect, the advice of psychologists will become your best assistant. In principle, it is impossible to change such a spouse either with the help of persuasion, or with the help of conspiracies, or with the help of coding, or with the help of hypnosis, and certainly not servility to him will help. Accordingly, it makes no sense to expect that everything will work out and get better on its own. That is, it is necessary to take active action. It is not the husband who needs to be changed. It is necessary to seek protection for yourself and your children.
How to make the right decision
Not a single article in a magazine or a single psychologist can make a decision for us. Personal relationships are a private matter between two people. If we see or feel that not everything is going smoothly, this is a reason to try to start working together.
You can contact a family psychologist, you can try to figure it out yourself. After all, another person may have a completely different picture of what is happening and his own “black list” of our mistakes and gaps.
Don’t look for clues in pop psychology articles titled “7 Signs of a Perverted Narcissist.” If we have already reached the desired emotional condition, we will definitely find these signs even in our cat.
Is it possible to make a man do whatever you want?
It’s rare that a man will indulge his chosen one in everything. True, this does not mean at all that such a result cannot be achieved. For your loved one to begin to do the desired actions, to do everything you want, it is enough to carry out one of the following rituals :
- CONSPIRACY. To cast a strong love spell , you just need to read a certain text. This method of witchcraft is simple and effective;
- prayer _ You should pray to God to help you solve the problem. You will also be able to achieve your goal if you turn to saints;
- ritual _ Implies an integrated approach. The ritual includes reading the plot and carrying out certain manipulations.
How can a woman regain her self-respect?
First let's look at why this respect may be lost.
“The main thing we are taught is to respect adults,” says psychoanalyst Natalya Oblakevich. - Respect means speaking respectfully, calling adults “you”, not raising your voice, watching your words and tone... all this is understandable, familiar to everyone, and at the same time nothing is clear...
Why should younger people respect their elders? Isn't it the other way around? Why can adults shout, blame, and sometimes even physically punish... Is this respectful? When a child is treated in this way, he seems to make a decision: “When I grow up, I will force myself to respect” or “When I grow up, I will build a respectful relationship with my partner.”
How to teach your husband a lesson for disrespect? Advice from psychologists: gather your thoughts
It is, of course, unpleasant for every woman to hear insults addressed to her. Naturally, there is a desire to insult in return or completely stop communicating with this person forever. The situation is completely different when humiliation and insults come from one’s own spouse. Firstly, his words hurt much more painfully. After all, he knows perfectly well how and where to “hit” you with a word in order to hurt and hook you more precisely. Secondly, leaving and not returning is much more difficult. You are still connected by marriage, children, friends and relatives, common living space, financial dependence. Thinking about what to do in this situation, a woman, as a rule, begins to rush from side to side. But he can’t decide on a certain rational action. This can go on for years. But this is simply unbearable. You need to figure out how to teach your husband a lesson for disrespect. The advice of psychologists in this case will be very helpful. First of all, you need to decide not “what to do,” but “what will happen if you do something, but incorrectly.”
When does it make sense to fight for a relationship?
There cannot be a single correct answer here; each case is individual. We can only say that it is not worth fighting for a relationship in which there is physical and emotional abuse. All other options are up to the couple. If both partners believe that they need to fight for the relationship, we can only wish them a speedy victory and the least losses. And most importantly, let this struggle be specifically for relationships, but not turn into a struggle with each other or with yourself! And to make it easier to achieve victory, you can take note of several useful “fighting techniques”; we list the main 5.
A blow to children
But our children suffer the most from such violence. Unfortunately, among many women there is an opinion that for a child the presence of absolutely any father is very important - even a tyrant and despot, even a name-caller and humiliator, even an alcoholic, as long as there is one. Women console themselves with the fact that he is still their own father. They are even more confident of this if men do not touch children. They endure everything for the sake of marriage and financial assistance.
Naturally, this is a huge misconception. For a child, the mother is always the person who provides him with protection. If they yell at her and cause pain, it means that the baby loses his sense of security. Accordingly, he gets stressed. And this is fraught with negative consequences. Some children begin to steal and lie, others begin to fear death, and still others begin to torture animals.
People rarely connect problems with a child on the one hand and humiliation from a husband on the other. And in vain. The connection is the most direct. Therefore, a woman who wants to maintain peace in her family must definitely figure out how to teach her husband a lesson about disrespect. There are a lot of tips. The main thing is to choose exactly what you need. Stop at the best option.
Excessive attention
So, the next stage. You figured out the reasons and made conclusions. Now you need to decide how to teach your husband a lesson for disrespect. Psychology offers several methods. The main thing is to correctly define the task. If you still love your husband, you should not make him suffer. This task is so that he can realize his guilt, understand what mistake he made and what pain he caused.
Start giving him undue attention. Most likely, this will not be easy at all. However, it's still worth a try. Give compliments, pleasant surprises, have romantic dinners. For what? Looking at your efforts, your spouse will be able to understand that he really was wrong, that you are the best woman, that no one will ever take care of him the way you do. Having realized all this, he will begin to suffer from remorse and repent in the depths of his soul. And self-flagellation, as you know, is the best punishment. If your spouse only slightly offended you, do exactly that.
Most negative outcome
The most dire consequences can be expected if your children have a sound vector. The ears of such children are hypersensitive. That is, they generally require quiet sounds and calmness. If the father yells at the mother, and even throws humiliating words, such a child not only loses the sense of security like other children - he also receives a powerful blow to the most sensitive area. Hearing terrible screams, he may gradually lose contact with the outside world and withdraw into himself. This sometimes even leads to autism or schizophrenia.
In general, a woman, especially if she is a mother, needs to take care of her family. Take the necessary actions that could help in the current situation. In a word, do everything to ensure that the husband respects and appreciates his wife.
Inattention
Next method. How to teach your husband a lesson for disrespect? An effective method, the opposite of the one described above, is inattention on your part. If your husband doesn’t see how you try to please him and forgets about important dates, naturally, this is very offensive. However, do not shout or swear. Just keep quiet. He will definitely remember everything he forgot about.
Let's say your husband promised to be back for dinner. Without warning, he goes with friends to a cafe or bar. Do the same to him in revenge. Let him feel like he is in your place.
Has your spouse stopped thanking you for the food you prepared? Think fried potatoes are ordinary? Stop cooking for him altogether. Leave several times without breakfast, lunch or dinner.
Constantly talking about how you are doing nothing while sitting at home? Why endure slander? Sit at the computer or sit in front of the TV. Don't actually do anything. Let him know what it's like.
Do you want to teach your husband a lesson because he claims that you are “resting” on maternity leave? Leave it with your baby all day. Well, have a shopping day with your friends or visit a spa. It is unlikely that after this he will be able to say that caring for a child is simple and easy.
