When a person comes to church for the first time, he learns about a huge number of new rules: how to dress, when to be baptized, and when to bow, how to fold your hands before the sacrament of communion, where a parishioner can and cannot go, how to pray before confession. But the most amazing news for a beginner is that for each difficult life situation there is a separate prayer. And it turns out that some prayer texts should be learned by heart. But many words are simply impossible not only to learn, but also to understand their meaning. And then believers begin to ask questions: is it really possible to communicate with the Lord only through memorized texts compiled by someone? Can you do this in your own words? In our article we will talk about how representatives of the Orthodox clergy approach this problem.
Prayer: what is it
Priest Boris Levshenko, cleric of the Church of St. Nicholas the Wonderworker (Moscow, Kuznetskaya Sloboda), head of the department of PSTGU, cites the definition of prayer presented in the “Catechism” of Metropolitan Philaret. According to the Lord’s definition, prayer is the lifting of the mind and heart to God, which is a reverent word from a person to God. His Reverend comments:
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In other words, this is a special, exalted state of soul in which a person glorifies, thanks and asks the Lord for his needs... We need to understand: if a person prays, it doesn’t matter, according to a prayer book or in his own words, but without a reverent, attentive feeling for the Lord, then such prayer is disgusting to God and causes his indignation and anger.
Is it possible to pray in your own words?
Each of us has a prayer book - a collection of prayers compiled by saints.
But the relationship of a believer with God is individual. So, maybe it’s better to pray to God in your own words? NS correspondents Ekaterina Stepanova and Alexey Reutsky asked Orthodox priests about this. Priest Boris Levshenko, cleric of the Moscow Church of St. Nicholas the Wonderworker in Kuznetskaya Sloboda, head of the department of dogmatic theology at PSTGU: “It’s better from a book than by heart”
– In his “Catechism,” Metropolitan of Moscow Philaret (Drozdov) gives the following definition of prayer: “This is the lifting of the mind and heart to God, which is a reverent word of a person to God.” In other words, this is a special, elevated state of soul in which a person glorifies, thanks and asks the Lord for his needs. There is prayer without words - in this case it is called mental or heartfelt, and also internal prayer. If in such a state of soul you turn to God with words, then Metropolitan Philaret calls this prayer “oral” or “external.” We need to understand that if a person prays, no matter according to a prayer book or in his own words, but without a reverent, attentive feeling for the Lord, then such a prayer is disgusting to God, causes his indignation and anger: “These people draw near to Me with their lips, and honor Me tongue, but their heart is far from Me. But in vain they seek Me…” (Matthew 15:8-9). Now about why it is still better to pray not only in your own words, but also according to the prayer book. For every person, an important choice is: are you together with the Church or are you alone? For some reason, it seems to me that the path to God, where you do not break away from the Church, is more reliable than the one that you invent yourself. And for several reasons. When we read morning or evening prayers from the prayer book, we seem to help each other in this prayerful appeal to God. Because we are all, as humanity, one, we are one. Just like in different churches, believers, reading the same prayers, although at slightly different times, help each other in communion with God.
There is also an old rule that says that it is advisable to read prayers not from memory, but according to the prayer book. What's the matter here? The Holy Fathers noticed: when reading this way, it happens that some word suddenly touches us, and in this case you stop. They explain this by saying that the guardian angel prays with us and wants to remind us of something, draws our attention to something. And in this regard, reading prayers from a prayer book is better for us than reading them by heart. Oddly enough, experience shows: you rattle off a prayer by heart and that’s it, but when you read it, you feel this connection with your guardian angel.
Sometimes people ask if it is possible to exclude words from prayer that confuse them. For example, the Lord's Prayer asks that God judge us in the same way that we judge others. Is this a convenient request? Not at all. Because we ourselves do not really like to forgive others for their sins. And it turns out that in this prayer we ask God to treat us in the same way as we treat those who have sinned against us, so that he does not forgive us our sins. Eliminate these words from your prayer. What will change? In my opinion, in the words “and forgive us our sins” there is a certain connotation, as if saying: “Lord, I cannot forgive, but I know that if I pray for this person, sooner or later my attitude towards him will change and I will have the strength to forgive him.” If I exclude these words, it turns out that I do not want this. And I will be able to oppose myself to God.
Lewis has a classification of people into two groups - some say: “...thy will be done,” and to others God says: “...thy will be done.” And here – “thy will be done” and “my will be done” – this contrast lies. When we cross out something from a prayer, this is self-will. And it turns out that then the whole prayer loses its meaning. Because if we refuse to obey God and are going to live the way we want, “according to our own will,” then we have no right to count on His help.
Archpriest Igor Judin, cleric of the Diveyevo Holy Trinity Metochion in Nizhny Novgorod: “When you repent, do not hide behind Church Slavonic words”
– In my own words, I think you need to repent of your sins. Repentance must be your own. Both in private and in confession. Do not hide behind Church Slavonic words, which are obscure and not very shameful, but say specifically what you have done and ask God for forgiveness.
But when we pray in our own words, our prayer is imperfect. After all, our heart is imperfect, it is not cleansed, it is mired in sins, in carnal passions and in worldly vanity. Our heart is made of stone, it will pull us down, and the prayer in our own words will turn out to be proud and vain, but we ourselves may miss it, not notice. And when we pray with the words of the holy fathers, we partly receive the spiritual state in which they were when they prayed. That is, we reach out to God for them, we rise upward on their prayer.
Archpriest Valerian Krechetov, rector of the Church of the Intercession in the village of Akulovo (Odintsovo district, Moscow region): “Lord, have mercy on me forty times! Where is this good?!”
– Every person can pray in his own words. But the prayers from the prayer book were compiled by saints, and their prayers allow us to feel and experience what they themselves felt and experienced. Comparing your own prayers with the prayers of saints is like comparing Chopin’s music and the melody you composed and hum, Pushkin’s poems and your poems. At the same time, whether the Lord will hear you depends on the state of the person’s soul, on his spiritual level. I read somewhere that one person (the most ordinary) prayed in his own words literally until he sweated blood, like the Lord in the Garden of Gethsemane. He had such strong experiences and faith in God. Without a doubt, the Lord heard such a prayer.
When reading a prayer book or Psalter, some people come across frightening expressions contained there. In fact, ancient texts have an ethnographic basis. For example, someone is shocked by the words “deliver me from bloodshed” (Psalm 50). What is meant here is: deliver me from the consequences of my sins. That is, if something is not clear in prayers, especially those that came to us from antiquity, you need to look at their interpretation, and not exclude them, shortening your prayer rule. Some people, however, joke: why say “Lord, have mercy” forty times - it’s easier to say: “Lord, have mercy on me forty times.” It's simpler, shorter and clearer. So should we live by this principle, or what?!
Archpriest Anatoly Efimenkov, cleric of the Assumption Cathedral in Smolensk, head of the department for interaction with law enforcement agencies, member of the Pardon Commission under the governor of the Smolensk region: “If you are late, pray in your own words!”
– When there is a lot of work, you get up early and run about business without having time to open your prayer book - in these cases, be sure to pray to God in your own words (do not skip the morning prayer “with self-reproach” at all), and God will hear you. But at the same time, a person is necessarily taught to read and write using an alphabet book, although he can speak his own language. Moreover, the mother understands her child, even if he speaks poorly and is difficult to understand for others. But he still needs to learn to speak competently. So it is with prayer. A person can speak to God all his life only in his own words, but if he wants to strive for perfection in this, he needs to learn from the holy fathers. A prayer book is the ABC of prayer.
Hegumen Vasily Pasquier, rector of the Church of the Iveron Icon of the Mother of God in the city of Alatyr, Chuvash Republic: “I do not use my words in prayers”
– When we teach children to speak, we use literary texts from famous talented authors and classics. Then, when children grow up, these words they read become familiar, clear, powerful to them and help shape their thinking and conversation. Also, the prayers that are found in the prayer book or Psalter teach a person to communicate with God.
I don’t think there is a difference for God when a person prays in his own words or reads prayers from a prayer book. After all, there is a silent form of prayer, prayer without words, which was practiced by the hesychast fathers. But for a person there is a difference, and a big one. Because the hesychasts were raised and imbued with prayers, psalms, scripture, and the word of God. And we, reading prayers according to the prayer book with all attention, learn to communicate with God in this way. Therefore, charismatics have no right to accuse the Orthodox of formalism. After all, Jesus Christ prayed in the synagogue, using words from traditional Jewish services, as did the apostles. Even in the new form of worship that the Lord Jesus Christ gave to his disciples (I mean the Eucharist), prayers from ancient Jewish traditions were used.
I personally do not use my own words in prayers, but I read the Jesus Prayer in my native language, and I also read prayers from services in French. But now, after 13 years in Russia, I have become accustomed to the Church Slavonic language, I like to read prayers in it, and, despite the fact that I did not study it specifically, I understand it.
I cannot help but recall the words of St. John Climacus: “Prudent silence is the mother of prayer... The lover of silence approaches God and, conversing secretly with Him, is enlightened by Him.”
Archimandrite Alexy (Polikarpov), abbot of the Moscow St. Danilov Monastery: “I
look at Him, and He looks at me, and we both feel good!”
– Every person has the right to pray in his own words, and there are many examples of this. We see this in church families, when small children, imitating praying adults, raise their hands up, cross themselves, perhaps clumsily, take some books, babble some words. Metropolitan Nestor Kamchatsky in his book “My Kamchatka” recalls how he prayed as a child: “Lord, save me, dad, mom and my dog Lily of the Valley.”
There is a vivid example of one’s own prayer, which was found in the tunic of a killed soldier. Red Army soldier Alexander Zaitsev turned to God before a difficult battle and said that he could die in this battle. And although I never knew Him, but:
“Isn’t it strange that in the midst of the most terrible hell, a light suddenly opened up to Me, and I saw You? Other than that I have nothing to say. I also want to say that, as You know, the Battle will be evil; Perhaps at night I will knock on You. And now, although until now I have not been Your friend, Will You allow me to enter when I come?”
We know that priests pray for their children and their flock at home and in their cells. I know an example when a priest in the evening, after a day of work, puts on clean clothes and simply, in his everyday words, grieves before the Lord for his flock, saying that some of them are in need, someone is sick, someone has been offended, “ Lord help them."
And of course, I think, in all these cases, the Lord hears the prayers of children and adults.
I knew one nun, Magdalene, about whom the book “Everyone is Alive with God,” published by the Danilov Monastery, tells the story. In the world her name was Tatyana, she was a psalm-reader. Under Stalin, she was sentenced to ten years in the camps. Even at this stage, as a pious person, she earned universal respect; people came to her for resolution of spiritual issues. And when, after the break, they walked on, she raised her hands up and said: “Lord, bless us all!” Tatyana could not come to terms with her sentence and in her prayers asked God to shorten her sentence. She prayed like this: “Lord, divide my term into four parts: two and a half years for the Mother of God, two and a half for St. Nicholas the Wonderworker, two and a half for the Prophet Elijah, and for me what remains.” All these saints were revered by her: she served in the temple of the Prophet Elijah and revered St. Nicholas. She meant that these saints would help her endure her imprisonment. And it so happened that she only served two and a half years. Her prayer was answered.
The prayer of the holy Venerable Silouan of Athos is well known, who, as a housekeeper at the Panteleimon Monastery, prayed for the workers who were subordinate to him. The other monks were surprised that his workers obeyed, but theirs did not. Saint Silouan explained it this way: “Having given the workers the task, I go to my cell and pray for each of them. Lord, look at Nikolai - he is so young, he left his village, his nineteen-year-old wife, who just gave birth to his child. He works here because he couldn't feed his family at home. Remember him, protect him from bad thoughts and be his protector. And so I pray for everyone. And the feeling of God’s closeness gradually grows, and at some point it is so strong that I cannot discern anything earthly.” In these moments he appeared before the face of God and already in this love of God he saw his suffering workers and prayed for them, and thus received God’s grace. There is a known case when one day a felled log rolled down a mountain and could crush a person. Elder Silouan began to pray - and the log stopped.
Prayer can also be silent. If we have reached such a level of spiritual life, words are not necessarily needed. Metropolitan Anthony of Sourozh gives such an example in his sermons. One peasant sat in the church for a long time and silently looked at the icons. He did not have a rosary, his lips did not move. But when the priest asked him what he was doing, the peasant replied: “I look at Him, and He looks at me, and we both feel good.” Here is a man who has achieved such a state.
After the death of Father John Krestyankin, his cell book was published. It contains prayers that the elder read daily, prayers of ascetics of the faith, prayers of saints. And I think there are his own prayers in there too. And his spirit, his aspirations towards God are also expressed through these prayers.
So, praying in your own words is appropriate, but let's look at it from another angle. Suppose a person prays only in his own words, what will his prayer be? He will thank God, ask for forgiveness, and make some requests of his own. Will he still have a need for prayer after this, or will it turn out that his thoughts and feelings have already been exhausted? Perhaps his thoughts are unclean and nasty, his spiritual life is primitive and shallow.
But when we turn to God with the prayers of saints who have experienced high states, understood their sinfulness and insignificance before God, understood His greatness and holiness, then, of course, we are approaching their state to the extent of our weak strength. And then the words of their prayers become close to us, and we can pray, first of all in church, with the prayers of these saints.
Therefore, there is no need to contrast prayer in your own words with prayer according to the prayer book. On the contrary, they complement each other. If we read carefully, trying to penetrate with our minds and hearts into the meaning of these prayers, they will become our own.
How to Pray
According to Hieromonk Job (Gumerov), prayer is needed to communicate with God. It represents a special Christian work and will be beneficial only if a person has a pure heart and his faith is deep and sincere. According to the remark of Saint Ignatius (Brianchaninov), in order to make it easier for a beginner to understand the conditions for offering prayers, the church has compiled special prayer rules, as well as texts.
Children's prayer
Is it possible for a child to pray while sitting? Children's prayer is considered the most sincere. Because children are innocent, naive and trust God. It’s not for nothing that the Lord himself said: be like children. There are concessions for children. Including in the prayer rule. The most important thing is not to force the child to read long and incomprehensible prayers. Let your baby read, for example, “Our Father” before going to bed and talk to God in his own words. This is much more useful than reading out the rules with a cold heart, because mom said so, that is, according to the principle “adults need to.” And it’s not for adults, it’s for the child himself.
Prayers of Thanksgiving
We often ask without thanking. The latter must not be forgotten. It would be unpleasant for us to fulfill someone's request and not hear thank you in return. Why should God give us something, knowing our ingratitude?
Is it possible to pray while sitting, read a thanksgiving akathist, or offer prayers of thanks? Are you tired? You feel sick? Sore feet? Then sit and don't worry about it. Sit down, take an akathist or prayer book in your hands, and read calmly, slowly, thoughtfully. Great benefit for the person praying. And God is glad to see such sincere gratitude.
What is inner prayer
In ancient times, the Apostle Paul called for resorting to inner prayer, which should be pronounced in your own words, putting your soul into them. According to the saint, this is better than repeating incomprehensible memorized words. Saint John Chrysostom also taught that the main thing in prayer is not memorized rules and texts, but one’s own sincere feelings for God. It is this attitude that will help a person to cleanse himself and develop spiritually. This is exactly what Jesus Christ taught in his sermons, calling people not to be like the Pharisees.
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How to communicate with God in your own words
The Monk Nicodemus of the Svyatogorets cites the rules once compiled by Basil the Great:
- first of all, words should be uttered praising the Lord;
- then express gratitude to Him;
- confess your sins;
- after this, ask the Lord for strength and mention what the person praying needs.
According to the righteous John of Kronstadt, even a few truly sincere words spoken with true love and faith are much more important for the Lord than long memorized texts from others. The works of Saint Theophan the Recluse also contain a statement about the importance of spiritual aspiration towards God. If difficulties arise, you can read the prayers several times until the soul desires to repent and pray on its own.
When you don't have the strength to pray
It happens that you don’t have the strength to pray. No way. Neither standing, nor sitting, nor lying down. Prayer doesn’t work, the person doesn’t want to do it.
What to do then? Force yourself to get up, stand in front of the icons, pick up a prayer book and read at least one prayer. Through force. Because we don’t always want to pray, no matter how surprising it may sound. How can you not want to communicate with God? It’s wild, strange, incomprehensible, but such states do exist. And when they appear, you need to force yourself to pray.
But it probably won’t be from the heart? And here everything depends on the person praying. You can read every word with utmost attention, even if it is just one prayer. Such a prayerful attitude will be much more useful than if you do not pray at all or read the rule with just your lips, when your thoughts are hovering somewhere far, far away.
How long does the morning and evening rule take? 20 minutes, no more. This is because a person quickly reads it, and that’s it. So it’s better to spend these 20 minutes reading two prayers, but with sense and concentration, than to scold them somehow, because that’s how it’s supposed to be.
