This Sacrament in the Orthodox Church is one of the most important events in the life of every couple in love. You need to prepare for such a serious step in advance and in a special way. From our material you will learn about all stages of preparation, that is, what Christians need for a wedding: is it necessary to fast, confess and receive communion, what icons are required and much more.
Who will be refused?
Before you start planning the ceremony itself, make sure that you will not be denied it. So, below are the reasons why a clergyman may not marry you:
- The engagement will not take place if you are blood relatives to each other, for example, a brother and sister, or spiritual godfathers.
- Father will not give the go-ahead to adherents of another religion, sect, as well as atheists and the unbaptized.
- If the age has not reached 18 years or has crossed the line of 60 years for a woman and 70 years for a man.
The rule regarding the older generation is often violated. Especially if the family has lived in an official marriage for a long time, the church will bless them in any case. - According to Christian customs, you can be married no more than three times.
- Those who already have three divorces behind them will also be denied the Sacrament.
- If you are married to one person and want to enter into a sacred union with another.
- The priest may refuse a couple whose age difference is too large.
- People who have taken a vow of celibacy and clergy will never have a wedding.
- In most cases, a church ritual will not take place if the lovers have not officially registered their relationship with the state - in the registry office.
Preparation
A wedding is possible only for newlyweds who have already formalized their relationship legally (exceptions are possible, but very rare). So, strictly speaking, any couple will get married after the wedding, the only question is how long their family life lasted.
If you just recently got married and the bride is innocent, then there are no special requirements. If your family has existed for some time, there are some nuances:
- According to the rules of the church only a virgin can wear a veil , while a wife who has already known her husband must cover her head with a light scarf (nothing, however, prevents you from decorating it with lace or making it from translucent fabric);
- If the bride is not getting married for the first time, then the dress should be chosen not snow-white, but any other light shade ;
- Older brides are advised to choose a cream, pastel, golden dress , even if this is her first and only marriage;
- Married couples need to remember that they should fast for three days before the ceremony - not eat animal food, tune in to spiritual cleansing and rebirth, and also avoid intimate relationships;
- A woman’s pregnancy is not an obstacle to the wedding, but on critical days it is strictly forbidden to attend church , so check your calendar.
Choosing a place
At one of the first stages, a temple is selected where the ceremony will take place. It does not have to be large and respectable; many, on the contrary, prefer a quiet, peaceful church somewhere in the countryside.
Advice. The chosen place should evoke only good feelings and emotions; if you don’t like something, then it’s better to continue your search.
There will also be a meeting and acquaintance with the priest who will conduct the cherished ritual. You will have an interview with him, during which he must make sure how important marriage is for the couple and she understands all its seriousness, and does not chase the ceremony as a beautiful and fashionable trend.
Father, in turn, should also instill in you the disposition and feeling of trusting him. He is obliged to tell in detail important details, without reproaching you if you do not know some rules and canons of the Orthodox Church. You can also consult with him about controversial issues, for example, your appearance, rings, a photo shoot in the temple, the best date, and so on.
If you often go to confession with a certain clergyman, you have known him for a long time and trust him, then it would be a great idea to have your wedding with him.
Meaning
A wedding symbolically means the unity of Christ in the form of the groom and the Orthodox Church in the form of the bride. The sacrament represents mutual vows of love and fidelity. After the exchange of rings and the solemn service, the bride and groom are considered spouses in the eyes of God, an unbreakable spiritual bond is formed between them, and the new family is blessed with a happy life and the birth of children. It is worth remembering that a wedding is forever, and there is no decrement ceremony. Peculiarity! Of course, the church meets the weak human nature halfway and allows remarriage, but only after penance, confession, and no more than three times in a lifetime. A civil unregistered marriage is also considered.
Which date to choose
When choosing a date and month, the easiest way is to study the wedding calendar, which will mark all possible days for the Sacrament.
Dates may vary depending on the year.
It is strictly prohibited to:
- during Easter and Maslenitsa week;
- during Lent;
- holidays of church and patronal days;
- during winter Christmastide;
- on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays;
- at night.
What needs to be done before the Sacrament
Stick to fasting
Before the wedding, lovers need to cleanse themselves spiritually and tune in to the sacred ceremony. Therefore, it is necessary to fast for three days - do not consume dairy, meat and fish products, as well as eggs and alcohol. If possible, do not smoke.
Ask a priest for advice if, for medical reasons, you cannot live without any of the foods listed. Perhaps he will allow some relaxation.
In addition, before the wedding, at least three days, you should give up carnal pleasures, fun entertainment, parties and various festive events. The best solution would be to devote your free time to doing things together, for example, reading prayers.
Confess
On the eve of the sacred ritual, confession is certainly necessary for both spouses. It is necessary to tell the priest about all your sins without hesitation. Do not hide anything; on the contrary, having told everything bad, God will forgive you ugly actions, words and even thoughts.
There is no need to be afraid that someone will find out about your actions, because in the church this is completely excluded. Be honest with the priest and do not think that you will be judged. In this case, he acts as an intermediary between you and the Almighty. Father will also help you cleanse your soul and enter your wedding completely renewed and sinless.
Take communion
You will go through this stage on the day of the Sacrament, or rather, before it, during the morning liturgy. The process of communion is simple - the clergyman will give you a spoonful of red wine and a piece of church bread.
You will not be able to receive Holy Communion if you have not confessed.
Before communion, from midnight, you do not need to eat, drink or smoke. Some people who have a weak body and may faint can eat a small snack. But the food should not be meat, fatty or high in calories. It is better to give preference to yogurt or kefir.
List of things needed for the ceremony
- Rings.
- Big candles.
- Bottle of church wine - Cahors.
- Two white towels or towels.
- Four small white scarves (two for those getting married under the candles and two for witnesses under the crowns).
- Icons of the Mother of God and Christ the Savior.
- Stamped passports and marriage certificate.
- A divorce document, if, of course, you were previously married.
All those present in the cathedral must wear crosses.
Rings
According to ancient tradition, the wedding rings of those getting married should be made of different metals. The man brought an item of gold to the temple, which meant a symbol of God, the sun and the head of the family. And the girl is a silver ring. It symbolized the moon and the church.
According to custom, the newlyweds will exchange rings three times during the ceremony. As a result, the husband's decoration remains on the wife's and vice versa. Masculine speaks of protection, help and responsibility, and feminine speaks of selfless loyalty, obedience and devotion.
But in the modern world, almost no one remembers these rules. Most often, lovers choose products made from the same material - gold or silver. Sometimes they are even paired, completely identical in appearance and differing only in size.
It is worth knowing that jewelry is not suitable for the Sacrament, because a strict priest may refuse to illuminate such rings and place them on the altar. This means that the ceremony may not take place at all.
Wedding rings already worn earlier are quite suitable for the role of wedding rings. They can be with small decoration, engraved in the form of each other's names, wedding dates or even prayers. But it’s better to avoid elaborate and bright models with large stones; leave such accessories for another occasion.
It is not recommended to remove your illuminated accessories, so choose them carefully.
Wine and candles
It is appropriate to buy candles in a church shop. There you will definitely find suitable and good quality ones. Plus it's convenient. If you chose decorative ones, then they need to be illuminated in the cathedral the day before.
Wine can also be purchased at a temple or chapel. When buying elsewhere, it is not always possible to find Cahors, so take any red and strong one. During the wedding, the couple will drink from the same cup.
Towels
For the ceremony you need to prepare two white towels or a towel. Both beautiful white cuts of fabric and pieces of snow-white material will do. One is laid under the feet of the spouses, and the hands of the other are bandaged. Afterwards they are kept in love for a happy married life.
Icons
They often take the parents’ ones, but if there are none, then they buy new ones. The icon of Christ is for a man, and the Virgin Mary is for a girl. The priest will bless the couple with them, and after the Sacrament they protect and protect the family. You must stand in a specially designated place.
Crowns
A necessary attribute for the ceremony is beautiful crowns, which the witnesses will hold over the heads of the spouses during the ceremony. The lovers in them are like kings who have reached the most important step in their lives - the wedding.
On the other hand, this is also a symbol of torment, because they are quite heavy. Since marriage is not only joy and happiness, but also overcoming difficulties together.
Most likely, the crowns will be given to you on the spot, so you won’t have to purchase them yourself.
Church wedding for already married couples a few years after the wedding
Who does not have access to the sacrament of a wedding What should you bring to a wedding Preparing for a wedding How to behave in a church Wedding ceremony Wedding after a wedding What to give for a wedding Beliefs and prejudices - a white wedding towel; - wedding rings; - pectoral crosses; - white handkerchiefs for candles; — a cape to cover the bride’s shoulders (for a low-necked dress); — icons.
Wedding is a sacrament of the Church in which God gives the future spouses, upon their promise to remain faithful to each other, the grace of pure unanimity for a common Christian life, the birth and raising of children. Those wishing to get married must be believing baptized Orthodox Christians.
They must deeply understand that the unauthorized dissolution of a marriage approved by God, as well as the violation of the vow of fidelity, is an absolute sin.
We are looking for witnesses
Witnesses in the cathedral perform a special mission - these are people who vouch for you and your union before God. They also undertake to help with advice in future married life.
First of all, Orthodox and baptized people should be invited to such a role. Atheists and representatives of other religions are no help to you in this matter. Choose close friends or relatives. It’s good if they are officially married for many years.
It is not recommended to take on people who are divorced, because anyone who has not been able to preserve their happiness is unlikely to be a good mentor to others. This also applies to lovers who live together, but have not signed at the registry office. The Church does not approve of such unions.
It is possible to ask a married couple to become witnesses, but it should not be the mother and father of the newlyweds. But it is worth knowing that the spouses who agreed to help will become spiritual relatives, and therefore will never be able to get married themselves after your Sacrament.
If you find it difficult to choose witnesses, then the ceremony can be held without them at all. The main thing is to warn the priest about this in advance.
Wedding in the Orthodox Church: rules and customs
Wedding is considered a church sacrament in which people promise to remain faithful to each other, and God gives them the grace of unanimity for this, so that it is easy for them to give birth and raise children, as well as to live a righteous Christian life. During the ritual, loving people transfer their aspirations, thoughts and weddings into the hands of a partner and promise to preserve the sacred bonds of marriage, not allowing vain passions into their lives that destroy family and love. The ceremony has no legal force, although a wedding in a church without registration with the registry office is an undesirable moment.
Our article will help you understand the essence of the wedding ceremony.
In addition, we will tell you in detail how to get married, and also consider the basic rules and customs. The sacrament of marriage involves two obligatory parts: betrothal and subsequent wedding.
At the same time, engaged people can independently terminate the agreement on a future marriage, but married people can no longer do so.
Signs
- You cannot pass between those getting married during the ceremony - because of this, the family may break up;
- witnesses must wear crowns on the couple, otherwise such a union will not be considered valid;
- blow out the candles at the same time for a happy married life.
It is worth remembering that Orthodoxy does not approve of superstitions, so whether to listen to them or not is a purely personal matter.
