Parental blessing is a kind of transfer of the power of the family, which accumulates over centuries. Our ancestors believed that blood ties are strong until the seventh generation, so each clan had its own Geneological tree. Blessing the newlyweds, the parents, in addition to the icons, presented the newlyweds with a census of their clan. This centuries-old tradition still exists today, and parents carry it out twice: before and after the registry office. Thus, they approve of the union of children, wish them well-being and give fatherly guidance.
Who and how should bless the newlyweds before the wedding?
A wedding is a significant event for both the groom and the bride. After all, after this day they will forever be bound by marital ties. This day is also trembling and exciting for parents, since they are giving their “little blood” into “strange” hands and it is unknown how the relationship in the family will develop further. Therefore, at every wedding, parents say parting words for a new life to the young. This parting word is called a parental blessing.
Parents are the most precious people who gave life. They simply cannot wish anything bad for their child, and no matter how difficult it is, they choose the warmest, deepest and most tender words that come from the heart. Therefore, this rite is considered sacred, and during the blessing, icons with the faces of saints are used. From time immemorial there has been a tradition of blessing the bride and groom before the wedding by the latter's parents. But the couple receives a blessing from the groom’s parents after the painting or wedding.
In every matter with heavenly permission
Not a single magnificent feast is complete without God's blessing. Starting such a great day as a wedding with a prayer to the Almighty is a good tradition of our people. Even today, like a century ago, holidays feature rituals and ceremonies that have their roots in ancient times. We, like our ancestors, bless the young couple for a long and happy life in love, peace and prosperity.
One of the traditions, still popular today, is to rebaptize newly-made spouses with the faces of saints. Many people know about such a ceremony, but few people know what icon to greet the newlyweds after the registry office. Not many people remember the history of this ritual.
When should we bless the young?
The couple receives an official blessing on their wedding day. How does this happen? The young man comes to pick up the bride and the first thing he does is buy her from his girlfriends and relatives. After the ransom is completed, when the groom has “proved” that he is ready to give everything for his beloved, the young woman is released to the groom and preparations begin for the Wedding Palace or church for the wedding. Before leaving, the future father-in-law and mother-in-law bless the newlyweds with the icon, wishing them happy and long years of married life.
As for the blessing from the groom's parents, they receive it after the painting or wedding, upon arrival home (in the modern interpretation, this is the restaurant where the banquet is held). They meet the newlyweds with icons and give parting words not only to their son, but also to their “acquired” daughter. Since the bride is part of this family, the groom's parents, with their blessing, recognize her as part of their family and commit to her as their child.
As the ancient belief says: “only after parental blessing can a strong, real and happy family be created.” After all, it is believed that the parent’s word is endowed with mysterious power and how it is pronounced will affect the future of the new family.
Path of happiness
It is best if the newlyweds are a little late. Then all the guests will have time to arrive on time. But a happy couple should not linger for a long time and make them wait, because this is disrespectful to friends and family.
Next, the spouses pass through a living corridor. According to our traditions, lovers must pass under embroidered towels, which will be held over their heads by their relatives. The ritual will ensure a happy life for the doves. This is one of the options for meeting young people after the registry office.
Guests can also shower them with flowers, money, and wheat. All these are original symbols. Petals mean a beautiful and lush life, coins attract finances to a new family, and cereals are responsible for abundance and children, which should soon appear. There are also regions where newlyweds are showered with hops to make them happy, nuts to make their marriage strong, and sweets to make their fate sweet.
Usually the toastmaster should be responsible for this moment. After all, his task is to explain to the public how to properly meet young people after the registry office.
Where are the young blessed?
It was already noted above that the bride and groom receive two blessings on their wedding day:
- the first from the bride's parents before the trip to the registry office (church);
- the second from the groom's parents after the ceremony.
Accordingly, the answer to the question of where the blessing ceremony should take place is simple. The newlyweds receive their first parting words in the bride's parents' house, and the newlyweds who have already taken place receive the second blessing in the house of the groom's parents. Since in the modern world they practically no longer “walk with the whole village” in a hut in the parental home, parting words from the father-in-law and mother-in-law are often received in a restaurant where a banquet has been ordered for the guests.
What icon do the bride's parents bless the newlyweds with?
It is customary that the parents of the young woman give their parting words while holding the icon of the Kazan Mother of God in their hands. In the Orthodox Church we especially honor this image, since the Mother of God was, and is still considered, the intercessor of the Slavic people. Such an icon is considered female, since the Mother of God is asked for the birth of a child, and they pray that she will protect the house from evil forces and misfortunes.
Interesting fact: At the instigation of Patriarch Kirill of Moscow, the holy image of the Kazan Mother of God was sent into space in 2011.
Read the text of the Orthodox prayer for love and happiness in the family
“Don’t be afraid, little flock! “I am with you and no one else is with you.”
Most Blessed Lady, take my family under Your protection. Instill in the hearts of my husband and our children peace, love and non-questioning of all that is good; Do not allow anyone from my family to experience separation and difficult parting, to premature and sudden death without repentance.
And save our house and all of us living in it from fiery ignition, thieves' attacks, every evil of the situation, various types of insurance and devilish obsession.
Yes, we too, collectively and separately, openly and secretly, will glorify Your Holy Name always, now and ever, and forever and ever. Amen.
What icon do the groom's parents bless the newlyweds with?
As for the meeting of the newlyweds by the groom's parents, this happens with an icon of the Savior in their hands. In Orthodoxy, such an image is called the Savior Almighty; the icon depicts the Son of God, who holds the open Gospel in one hand, and with the other gives a blessing to everyone looking at him. They turn to this icon both in difficult times and in moments of joy, and also pray for the well-being of the family.
Traditionally in Rus', this icon was the first to be brought into the newlyweds’ house.
Today, it is allowed for the newlyweds to meet the parents of both the groom and the bride after the wedding ceremony. At such a meeting, two icons are held in their hands (the icon of the Kazan Mother of God is brought to the restaurant by the bride’s parents), but the ceremony of blessing is carried out by the groom’s parents in the face of the Savior.
Wedding genius - toastmaster
Before biting or breaking bread, you should cross it. Children must kiss the loaf. Very often traditions diverge. Even neighboring cities and villages have rituals unique to them. In order to avoid unpredictable events and problems at the wedding, the action plan should be discussed in detail.
Parents should talk in advance about how to welcome newlyweds after the registry office. This can be done at an engagement party or just before a special day. Each party should first describe how they see the ceremony, and then discuss the differences and write one plan for the ceremony. But here the older generation should also take into account the opinion of children, because first of all it is their day.
If none of the families has any idea what needs to be done, then the script can be entrusted to the toastmaster. It is recommended that you first watch videos of weddings conducted by a professional. This will make it easier to imagine the overall picture and atmosphere, add something to the plan or refuse something.
If parents are concerned about religious issues, they should first consult with the priest.
How to properly bless the groom's young parents?
There can be two scenarios for blessing newlyweds who have already taken place.
- In the first version, only the parents of the young man greet the couple with the icon of the Savior.
- In the second, the parents of both the bride and groom greet the newlyweds with two icons.
The images must be wearing towels, since it is not recommended to take them with bare hands. According to tradition, the image of the Savior is held by the groom's father. He speaks parting words first, then gives his mother his blessing. The newlyweds cross themselves with the icon three times, and the groom is allowed to kiss the image first, then the bride.
If both sets of parents are meeting, then the father of the groom and the mother of the bride can be placed in the center with icons. And on the sides, for example, the father of the bride with champagne and the mother of the groom with a loaf of bread. In this case, both pairs of parents can give a blessing to the new family in turn and bless them with two icons, baptizing the young three times and letting them kiss the icons in turn, starting with the groom. After the blessing ceremony, the newlyweds are served a loaf and salt, as well as glasses and champagne.
Final ceremony
Before sitting down and feasting, parents must complete one more mission. They are obliged to say a few good words to their children. If it’s hard for you to come up with congratulations on your own, ask the toastmaster how to greet the newlyweds after the registry office. The words he advises are always successful, but often not emotional. Therefore, it is better to wish something on your own, from the heart. Remember that the speech should be short so as not to bore the guests.
Be sure to remember God and life with faith in him. No one knows children better than you. Therefore, the words you say will be accurate and touching in any case. If you wish, you can tell a beautiful legend or story from childhood. But do not forget that you may still be given the floor during the feast.
After the ceremony you can relax. A festive dinner, dancing and fun awaits you.
How should the bride's young parents be blessed?
The first blessing, held before going to the registry office or church, is held at the bride's home, after the groom has passed all the tests. It can be carried out in different ways.
- If you follow all the rules and traditions, then only the bride and groom, parents and godparents are present at the blessing.
- Modern rules are not so “strict”, so everyone participating in the ransom and guests are invited to the blessing ceremony.
The blessing itself goes as follows. The girl’s father gives the mother an icon of the Mother of God, the mother takes it with a towel and gives a parting speech to her daughter and son-in-law, after which the father speaks. At the end of the speech, the girl’s mother baptizes her daughter with the icon three times, then her son-in-law three times. In conclusion, the two young people are baptized with the icon three times, thereby the mother-in-law recognizes that they are a couple. Next, he gives the icon a kiss, first to his daughter, then to his son-in-law. Young people must cross themselves before leaning against the image.
Father shouldn't be silent either
The future father-in-law should also know how to bless his daughter before the wedding, because without his words, the mother’s parting words do not have the necessary power. However, it is the mother of the bride who speaks first. And she holds the icon. Men, as a rule, are taciturn, but the father must still tell his daughter that he blesses her for this marriage, that he wishes her a happy family path.
When the parents say their parting words, they need to kiss their daughter, then her chosen one. By this they make it clear that they accept him into the family as their own son.
Words of blessing from mother to daughter before wedding: text
Dear daughter! I am so glad to see your sparkling eyes, full of love and happiness, your sincere smile and inexhaustible energy - this is the greatest happiness for a mother! Today is a new, happy stage in your life, and I really want this happiness to last for many years. Listen to my parting words - take care of your husband, be loving and gentle, fill your life together with ease and joy, be a supporter for your spouse in difficult moments, be wise and understanding. May your future spouse make you the happiest woman in the world, may you know what it is like to be a beloved wife, dear mother, happy grandmother. Preserve your love, your sincere and pure relationship, increase your happiness, because so many joyful and bright days await you together! I bless you, my dear!
Words of blessing from the mother of the bride to the newlyweds at the wedding: text
Dear and beloved newlyweds! I will say without hiding that today is a very exciting day for me. I give my dear girl into the loving hands of her husband and now my son! I give it with a light heart, with confidence that you will take care of each other, preserve your sincere feelings, protect your family from evil eyes. I wish you to be each other’s support, an oasis in the desert, a source of vital energy and love. Be happy!
The ritual needs to be revived!
If the parents of the couple themselves received the blessing, it is a little easier for them. You won't have to think about the words for long. How to bless your son before the wedding? Yes, just pass on the parting words heard before your wedding, so to speak, “by inheritance”!
If the parents of the newlyweds did not receive blessings, this is not a problem. You just need to learn a prayer and come up with words of wishes for fidelity, tenderness, love, prosperity, prosperity, etc. In general, everything you need for a happy married life. By blessing their children sincerely and from the heart, parents will give them a feeling of support for many, many years.
Mother's parting words, by the way, bring a lot of softness and tenderness, generosity and the ability to forgive, receptivity and warmth into the relationship of young people, and rid the family of aggression and cruelty.
Video: How to bless the young?
Well, to summarize, we note that after the wedding, the icons remain in the family of the newlyweds. They become a family heirloom, which is designed to protect and protect this family from adversity, disease and sadness. Believers place images in the corner or above the bed. Those who are not so devout keep the icons in a certain place without displaying them. According to tradition, these icons are inherited by children at their wedding.
Here is a short excursion into the traditions and rituals of blessing young parents; perhaps you will be interested in reading about this:
- “Fashionable wedding styles. Organizing a wedding with your own hands";
- “The best wedding scenarios. How to spend the second wedding day?
- "Wedding signs and superstitions for the bride and groom."
A few more nuances
We should also not forget about some serious points. It is necessary to give parting words to your son before the wedding not just with icons in your hands. They must be held with towels, just like a loaf.
After the words of blessing have been spoken, the newlyweds must be crossed with icons and given a kiss. The sign of the cross is performed from top to bottom and from left to right - this is how it is according to church canons. You need to mentally “replay this action in your head” in advance so as not to get confused at the most crucial moment.
