If communicating with your mother-in-law is a real torment, and you go to common holidays like hard labor in order to maintain the picture of an ideal family, I have great news for you. In fact, there is no need to endure and suffer at all.
Thinking about your inner comfort and building healthy boundaries will prevent you from becoming a bad wife and daughter-in-law. You just need to do it right.
In this article:
How to influence the relationship between mother-in-law and husband? How to get your mother-in-law away from your family? What to do if your mother-in-law often comes to your house?
Conspiracy from an evil mother-in-law
Against a mother-in-law who is hostile towards everyone and especially her daughter-in-law, you can perform a ritual - a ritual for her property and yours. To do this, take one of her things and one item of clothing that she gave you - tie them together in a knot and at the same time say:
“Yes, now you are my dear mother, may you love me like your child - there will be no barriers between us, you will get rid of anger and hatred for us, from now on and forever you will be like a mother to me.”
After this, hide the bundle in a secluded place and don’t show it to anyone - it’s like an amulet that will bring peace to you and protect you from the malice of an evil mother-in-law.
Cover up with your husband.
If you have some kind of confrontation with your mother-in-law, do not make your husband a mediator, resolve the conflict directly. Do not drag your husband into your relationship and do not allow your mother-in-law to do this. Don't get into the "complaining" game. Your mother-in-law complains about you to your husband, and you complain to him about your mother-in-law. As a result, a man in such a situation may distance himself from both of you.
Any relationship is always difficult work and requires dedication, otherwise it will not develop. Everyone’s experience with their mother-in-law is different, and universal advice like “accept her” or “love her with all your heart” will not work. Treat your mother-in-law with respect and gratitude and ask for the same attitude towards yourself. Find time for it in your busy schedule and it may become easier for you to find common ground.
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How to get rid of your mother-in-law forever
To keep your mother-in-law away from your home, you can perform one of the rituals presented below.
Removal from photo
They spend it on the waning moon, after sunset - you will need a photograph showing the husband and mother-in-law, preferably taken recently. The photo is slowly torn in half, and at the same time say:
“I break it - I weaken the heavy and irrepressible force, I separate the mother from her son, like summer and winter. Let the connection unravel like a thread, let it break without pain, and let it roll away from the threshold like a ball of hatred.”
Afterwards, attach half of the photo with the image of your spouse, face to face to your photo, and sew them together with red thread. But take half of the photo where the mother-in-law is depicted - take it far from the house, tear it into small pieces and throw it in the wind.
Ritual on the bow
It is also carried out on the waning night luminary, and to carry it out you will need an onion and 3 church candles, a glass of plain water. At the very beginning, light the candles and, after cutting the onion, lower the halves into a glass of water, saying out loud:
“Just as this onion and water are united, so we are God’s servants...our name and spouse...we are united, no one can separate us - put us at odds. Let my husband only listen to me, listen to me, support and protect me, and be on my side in a dispute with my mother. Without being a little son, he was able to get rid of all the ugliness.”
Say them 7 times, and place the glass of water on the windowsill for a week, and after this period, bury everything in the ground. After the onion sprouts in the open ground and, so to speak, starts to shoot, your mother-in-law will leave you and will avoid your house.
To remove the mother-in-law from the husband's life
To prevent a husband from listening to his mother in everything she says and turning him against his daughter-in-law, several effective rituals can be performed.
Ritual for salt
To prevent your husband from running to his mother every 5 minutes for advice, and at the same time, the mother-in-law herself does not sit in your house day and night - perform a simple salt ritual. Take a handful of salt and say over it 13 times:
“You are salty, white and free-flowing salt - drive God’s servant away from my house... the name of the mother-in-law... so that she can live her own life and not interfere with ours. Help me get rid of her advice and complaints, protect me from evil and hatred. Help her forget the way to our house, and stop coming to us.”
Afterwards, sprinkle the charmed salt on her threshold and put a little under her rug - while she is there, the mother-in-law will not come to you unless you call her yourself. This serves as an astral barrier from her irrepressible control and attention to your home.
Ritual with fire
This ritual is carried out using a joint photo of mother and son - you carefully tear it into 2 parts with your hands, without a knife or scissors. The main thing at this moment is to mentally imagine how the connection between them is broken and she simply stops coming to you.
Next, burn each half of the photo separately and without mixing the ashes - just scatter the ashes from the part of the photo with your mother-in-law in the wind blowing from the house, but also scatter the ashes from the part of the photo with your spouse in the wind - the main thing is that it blows into your house. Such a ritual is simple and convenient in that there is no need to remember and pronounce certain words of the conspiracy - the main thing is to mentally imagine how the connection between your spouse and mother-in-law is broken.
Raising the white flag: psychological help for a cunning daughter-in-law
If you don’t love your mother-in-law, you can be heartbroken and complain to your friends and husband as much as you want, but this is unlikely to help as much as psychology. Learn universal recommendations for improving relationships with the second main woman in your husband’s life. The answer to the question “What should I do if I hate my mother-in-law?” Psychology will not provide specific information; science can only give some general advice:
Be polite and patient. Don't show your ambition, act wisely. The more you protest, swear and rage, the worse your relationship with your mother-in-law will become. Try the opposite method - behave like an angel, polite, helpful, affectionate and patient. Surely the mother-in-law will simply be taken aback, begin to reflect on your behavior and her own, and then calm down at least a little.
Spend time together outside the home. Have you ever suggested that she go shopping? How about going to the cafeteria? Try to take on the role of her friend and chat with her about something neutral. A cunning daughter-in-law will study her mother-in-law’s taste preferences during a conversation and will correctly use this valuable information in the future: for example, she will give her a handbag she likes or bring home her favorite cake. And the woman who just fought with you will think that you are not such a nasty person.
Don't try to be in charge and prove yourself right. It just doesn't make sense. Your mother-in-law is much older than you and clearly will not change in character. And in your future family life, you will need the ability to adapt and be emotionally flexible. Besides, you can agree with your mother-in-law, but do everything a little differently. This way you will achieve your goals faster, only in a calmer way.
Give compliments to your mother-in-law and husband. Pleasant speeches and praise will please anyone
Start complimenting your husband and his mother carefully so that it looks natural. They both should be together and hear your praises
For example: “Dear, today your mother cooked such a wonderful stew that I almost bit off my tongue,” and in relation to your husband immediately say: “Victoria Kuzminichna, your son is so gallant! You raised him to be a real man!” This way you will amaze your loved ones, and the goal, that is, their good mood, will be achieved.
Don't involve children in the conflict. If you are not on good terms with your mother-in-law, then your children, on the contrary, may dote on their grandmother, just as she does on them. Don’t push your granny and her grandchildren against each other, leave all the squabbles only between you. Otherwise, you will put yourself in an unfavorable light.
Don't take revenge. By plotting evil, you poison your existence, filling yourself with negativity. Instead of thinking about dirty tricks, it’s better to spend time doing what you love, going for a walk with your husband or friends, or going shopping. In addition, revenge is a direct road to ongoing enmity with your mother-in-law, and also proof of your direct contribution to the outbreak of war.
Don't complain to your husband about your mother-in-law. Imagine yourself in the place of your spouse: his mother raised him and raised him, and you regularly denigrate her. If there are no serious problems with your mother-in-law, it is better not to mention your enmity to your husband at all. Solve questions of this kind yourself. It is not known which side your spouse will take after complaints – yours or your mother’s.
Contact a psychologist. If you feel that you cannot cope with the onslaught of your mother-in-law, it is better to consult a psychologist. Knowing human nature and looking for weaknesses in your opponent will give you significant advantages. In the end, if your mother-in-law hurts you so much, even to the point of hatred, it means that there is clearly something wrong with your self-esteem and nervous system. A specialist will work with you on the situation, teach you how to react differently to what is happening, and strengthen your psychological resistance to stress.
And the best step towards getting closer to your mother-in-law will be a friendly conversation, in which you can unobtrusively find out the reasons for her nagging and voice your experiences. Perhaps she didn’t even know that she was causing trouble, and from now on she will behave much more correctly. We hope that your relationship with your mother-in-law will normalize, and you will begin to live with her in peace and harmony.
There is a conspiracy to keep the mother-in-law out of the family
Spell for a bar of soap
This ritual is performed after sunset three times and always on the waning moon, reading the words of the ritual spell 9 times. They carry out a soap conspiracy - you must buy it on an even day, and the words of the conspiracy are as follows:
“How quickly this soap is washed off, how quickly it dissolves in water - so quickly you mother-in-law ... name ... may you submit to me, my words and deeds. They walked along the road - 2 sisters, they walked and were tired, they took bread out of their bags, ate and chewed, and gave crumbs to the birds. And just as there is no eaten bread on earth, so there will be no anger on me from you. You have no...name of mother-in-law...interest in me...your name...and...name of husband... - don’t walk around us, but leave us behind and leave us alone, forever and ever, from this word until the end of the century.”
After this, give this soap to your mother-in-law - as soon as she washes it off, her desire to walk and communicate with you will go away. This is very convenient and practical, and to enhance the effect, it is best to give your mother-in-law such small and pleasant gifts from time to time.
Red thread plot
To carry it out, take a red woolen thread and visually divide it in half - cut it in this place with a knife. Then tie a knot at each end of a separate thread - you don’t need to say any words, the main thing is to think about how you will get rid of the annoying mother-in-law. After this, hide one thread in a secluded place in your house, but take the second one far from the house and leave it on a tree branch without tying it.
So that the mother-in-law loves the daughter-in-law
In order for the mother-in-law to ask for forgiveness and fall in love with her daughter-in-law, adopt one of several rituals.
Ritual for plantain
It is this herb that you will need when performing this magical ritual - it is important to pick not so much the leaves as its inflorescences, if you have them, then take the seeds. Carefully cut all this and dry it - during the ritual, grind the dried parts of the plantain in a mortar and say:
“I’m not cooking soup, but a decoction, a broth for my mother, let the evil in her perish, so that my family does not disappear from the face of the earth. Do not set foot on the threshold of negativity - I punish both the daughter-in-law, the bride and the mother, so that there can be peace between them.”
Afterwards, brew tea with dried plantain and give it to your mother-in-law and husband, and drink the aromatic and healthy drink with them.
Ritual for a pie and 7 candles
For this ritual, it is worth buying 7 wax candles from the church and baking a cake or pie yourself - it is advisable to do all this on a new moon or during a full moon. At midnight, stick candles into the pie and light them with a match, then read the words of the conspiracy:
“Mother, you are my dear - although not by blood alone, you gave me a husband. I ask God to teach us to live in such a way that the walls do not tremble and that we do not bend our hearts - as soon as we eat this cake, all the walls between us will collapse. We don’t know hatred.”
They say this appeal to higher powers 5 times and when the candles burn out completely, take them out of the cake and treat your mother-in-law to a cake in the morning. As they say, there is a double benefit - to improve relations with your mother-in-law and to have a delicious breakfast.
Intervention on all fronts
It so happens that many older Russian women have a peculiar mentality. They sincerely believe that they are specialists in many fields, and raising children is their calling. After all, they raised their own child (children), what handsome and smart people they turned out to be! Young parents are inexperienced, shouldn't we give them a couple of valuable parenting tips?
“A couple of tips” imperceptibly becomes a total intervention in the educational process.
- Children need to be dressed as warmly as possible in case of a draft or sudden wind. Does your child sweat while running outside with friends? It's okay, the heat doesn't hurt your bones.
- Balanced nutrition - what is this new fashion? Everything that fits into your mouth is useful. The baby should be plump, this is a sign of health. And in general, everything should be eaten with bread.
Is this a familiar picture? Oh yeah, you know what I mean now.
Conspiracy from the future mother-in-law
If you have not yet officially married your spouse, but your mother-in-law has already tired you somewhat with her moralizing and constant nagging, you can perform a pancake ritual.
It is enough to cook them yourself, or even better in the house where the mother-in-law and her son live - while baking them, you should smile at your future relative and at the same time say the following words:
“You golden pancakes - I’m such a craftswoman, I’m sweet and pretty to everyone in the world, and especially to my future mother-in-law ... name ... May she live like a peaceful dove, and may I be a servant of God ... her name ... may she love and dove, once again does not offend, often does not haunt the house. How the hell do you eat this - so be it according to my word"
After this, be sure to feed your mother-in-law with the prepared pancakes.
If the father took the child from the mother, what to do?
If the parents are divorced, but the father still loves his child, then you need to calmly agree on a schedule of visits with the baby. A father has the right to communicate with his child. While defending justice, we should not forget about the mother’s feelings.
As noted earlier, if the father stole a child together from his ex-wife without prior warning, then the mother has the right to contact law enforcement agencies demanding that the baby be returned to her immediately.
Such disputes are considered in court. The latter determines whether dad will be allowed to see his child or not. During the case, you will need to find out the child’s opinion. His interests are necessarily taken into account.
Moreover, after reaching the age of ten, the child has the right to express his personal opinion on many things. He can also decide for himself with whom he wants to live at the present time.
In any case, it is important that the mother always knows where her daughter or son is.
Conspiracy against an evil mother-in-law
A magical ritual is an effective protection against your mother-in-law, which you can resort to if your relationship with your spouse’s mother is very strained, and she herself is not too happy with a daughter-in-law like you.
Ritual for jelly
Such a ritual will allow you to calm the mother-in-law’s anger and help you establish relationships with her, so to speak, glue them together with the help of a charmed jelly. Just cook a delicious jelly, fruity and sweet, and while it cooks on the fire and the water gurgles, say the following words over it:
“The good servant of God ... the name of the mother-in-law ... rejoices over me - the good daughter-in-law ... as a mother rejoices and admires her child, a mare - and her foal, a sheep - her little lamb, the Holy Father - on a bright Easter. God, mother-in-law, send me kindness - let it be according to my word and your will.”
After this, treat your mother-in-law to jelly - the result will show itself almost instantly.
Ritual for the new month
Just bake pancakes for the new month and while they are baking in a frying pan, say the following words:
“Just as a new month is born in the sky, it rolls along its own path, being its own master - so the mistress of the young servant of God... name... strength and power was born over her beloved mother-in-law. Mother-in-law, I tell you, I hold all the members of the household in my right hand, I know all the roads, let it be my way.”
As practice shows, the more often you treat your mother-in-law to pancakes, the stronger and faster the ritual will work.
Ritual for the waning moon
Such a ritual, if carried out correctly, will allow you to protect yourself from the attacks of your mother-in-law - speak the words of the ritual in the house of your husband’s mother, preferably on her thing, the bed. Any thing will do here - the main thing is that it is in the mother-in-law's house all the time. They carry it out to the waning night star, and it sounds like this:
“As this month wanes and comes to an end, so the quarrels in our house began to wane. If only my mother-in-law would be silent, like a fish in the sea is silent, like the dead don’t scream.”
Full Moon Ritual
For this ritual, you should prepare a good lunch or dinner in your home, invite your mother-in-law to visit, and most importantly, seat her first at the table. And when she starts eating, show her the fig under the table. But this is not the main thing - when you set the table, it is important to say the following words of the conspiracy three times over it:
“Like the Moon in the sky, it shines brightly, it illuminates the whole sky, so my mother-in-law’s heart was full of love for me, she lavished affection on me, just as the full moon illuminated the house. I will lock my words with a lunar lock, and I will hide the key under the menstrual light.”
As a rule, the ritual takes effect immediately as soon as the mother-in-law tries the first dish from your table.
