The most important thing a child should know about God is that the Lord God is the main being, the Creator and Creator of everything that exists. God is an invisible spirit who, like a king, has full power and authority, but not in one country, but throughout the whole world. He exists everywhere: he sees and cares about all people, and is the strongest, wisest and kindest ruler. God watches over the world and all people on Earth, wanting them to live in happiness and justice. It is difficult to understand who God is separately without his activities. Therefore, it is important to know that he is the creator of all things, as well as the forefather, i.e. human parent.
God is the creator of the world
First you should pay attention to the whole world around you: mountains, forests, trees, flowers.
In addition to people, the world is inhabited by a huge variety of birds, animals and insects. A man walks on the ground, and above him there is a beautiful blue sky, from which the sun shines and warms, rain drips and clouds frown. How beautiful and amazing this world is. But before, once upon a time, none of this happened. There were no people, no animals, not even heaven and earth. There was only one God who willed this wonderful world to appear. First, God created Angels - good spirits. Then he created the earth, but there was darkness all around. God worked for six days to create white light and the beautiful nature that surrounds us now.
On the first day, God created light and it became light on earth.
On the second day, God created the firmament of the earth and a firmament appeared above the earth.
On the third day, according to the word of the Lord, rivers, seas, lakes and mountains appeared on earth. On this same day, God decorated the earth with green grass, beautiful flowers, fruits and vegetables.
On the fourth day, the Lord created luminaries in the sky. At the same time, he wished that one would be the sun and illuminate the world during the day, and the other luminary would be the moon and illuminate the earth at night.
On the fifth day, the Lord decided to create beautiful fish and birds on earth.
On the sixth day, by the will of God, animals appeared, “a pair for each creature.” They all rejoiced at life in this wonderful world and praised the Lord God. And God looked with pleasure at his creations and was pleased with the new world.
When to Start Christian Parenting
Among modern parents you can often hear the opinion that very young children do not need to be brought to church and generally introduced to the faith, since they do not understand anything yet. This is a deeply erroneous opinion, due to which one can lose the most favorable time, when the child is most amenable to laying the foundations of religion.
Christian Parenting
Orthodoxy teaches that even in the womb a child feels spiritual influence. If the expectant mother prays, goes to church, and regularly participates in the Sacraments of the church, then the child in her belly receives spiritual gifts even before birth. It will be easier for such children to grow up, easier to know God in adulthood, because they “met” Him even before they were born.
You should try to bring very young children to church as often as possible, give them communion, and give them a drop of holy water. The pure soul of a child will absorb the grace of God and grow in it. Such a child will grow in faith from childhood, and when the time comes to make his own choice, it will be much easier for a person not to leave the Christian path.
Already at the age of 3-4 years, a child is ready to consciously perceive the basics of religion. You can tell your child about the Creator, the heavenly powers, and the saints in an accessible form. There are special children's manuals, cartoons, and books that make this process much easier for parents. There is also a Children's Bible, a book that every parent should purchase.
On Christian parenting:
- Good Orthodox cartoons for children
- How to teach children prayer
- How should children behave in church?
Do not forget that children under the age of 7 can begin the Sacrament of Communion in church without special preparation. A small child can be fed in the morning; there is no need for confession before communion. Therefore, it is very important at this age to bring your child to church as often as possible, so that he becomes close to it and gets used to being there all the time. Then, even after 7 years, when the sacrament will require some effort in preparation, it will be easier for children.
Important! There is no such age when children have not yet grown up to God. From birth to the end of life, a person needs spiritual food, which faith in the Lord gives us.
Teenagers are the most susceptible to parental influence, and religious upbringing will be no exception. During adolescence, the personality is already sufficiently formed, its own goals, views, and opinions appear. This age is often characterized by rebellion, rejection of authority, and self-centeredness.
Of course, if during such a period parents first begin to talk to their son or daughter about God, it is unlikely that they will receive a response. Especially if the faith is promoted too persistently or even aggressively. The effect will only be the opposite.
Like any upbringing, it is easier to exert spiritual influence the younger the child. Young children are malleable, receptive to everything new, and trusting. This is fertile soil for sowing the seed of faith in them. And if time was not wasted in childhood, then sooner or later the fruits will become visible.
Bible for children
God is the one who created man
Everything pleased the Lord in his new created world, but he understood that there was not enough man on earth.
And God decided to create man, who, according to God’s plan, should become master over all animals, birds and plants. In a word, the Lord created man in his own image and likeness so that he would become the rightful owner of the entire earth. And God created the first man from a piece of earth, from which he created a body and breathed a soul into it. He endowed the soul with reason so that a person could think and consciously make decisions.
The first man was a man named Adam. But over time, the Lord noticed that Adam was lonely living alone on earth. He could not talk to anyone, nor share his joy or sadness.
Adam was bored alone, and the Lord took pity on him and decided to create for him a wife who would always be by his side. The Lord God put Adam into a very deep sleep and took one rib out of his chest. From this rib he created Adam's wife, Eve. Adam and Eve fell in love with each other very much and lived happily together.
How to talk to children about God: five mistakes parents make
Photo: FunKa-Lerele
Children of believing parents often ask their moms and dads questions about faith. But parents do not always react correctly to such questions - and this is not only about the content of their answers, but also about their attitude towards such questions in general. What mistakes are the most common and how to avoid them, says Archpriest Andrei Bliznyuk, a teacher of the law at St. Peter's School (Moscow).
Lack of time to answer, underestimation of the importance of questions
Photo: Giuseppe Milo
This applies not only to answers to questions about faith - modern parents in general are sorely lacking time to communicate with their children. There are sociological studies according to which a modern parent communicates with a child for about ten minutes a day, and most of this time is spent not on heart-to-heart conversations, but on the daily routine: “show me the diary,” “brush your teeth,” “did you do your homework?” Therefore, children have to look for answers to their questions from strangers who may not have teaching skills, may not have genuine knowledge, and may not even always wish the best for our children. And you shouldn’t entertain the illusion that it’s enough to talk to your child once a week, lecture him and tell him what is good and what is bad. No, not enough! The child needs daily attention to him and a daily answer to his questions.
Alas, in practice it happens differently. Parents say: “I’ll tell you later,” “You’re still young, you won’t understand,” “Ask your confessor about this in confession.” And then a child comes to confession, and there are 70 confessors standing there, and the priest came out of the altar to confess before communion. Naturally, he will not answer - he has no time.
This is why it happens that even in believing, church-going families, children grow up who, having already finished school, have no idea about the resurrection of the dead and the life of the next century, but know only about the afterlife of the soul. Or, for example, a fifth-grader child from a very churchly family asks the question: “Where are the bones of Jesus Christ?” Or the children don’t know what the name Jesus even means. I can give many such examples. And the reason is that parents do not talk to their children about spiritual topics.
Meanwhile, parents need to understand from the very beginning that children’s questions can be any, not just about faith! - this is very serious, very important, it is absolutely necessary to answer them. No time? This means that you need to change something in your life routine and carve out this time.
Moreover, you need to prepare very seriously to answer children's questions. It’s even best to do this in advance - talk with other parents, with a confessor, read Orthodox resources devoted to this topic - for example, the online magazine “Batya”, which, by the way, I can recommend to single mothers raising sons. After all, it is difficult for such a mother to answer men’s questions; here she has to attract adult men - be it a confessor, a school teacher, or a relative. But you yourself need to know what to answer to a boy so that he develops his masculinity.
But it may also be that you heard a question from a child that you find it difficult to answer right away. In this case, you need to honestly say: “I won’t be able to answer now, but I’ll think about it, look for the answer and definitely tell you.” Naturally, you need to keep your promise, and do it as quickly as possible. If you return to the conversation six months later, the child will already remember that he asked and was not answered.
And, of course, you can’t push all children’s questions about faith onto a confessor or a teacher at an Orthodox school. By doing this, you thereby demonstrate to the child that the spiritual sphere is alien to you, that you do not know the Christian doctrine, that your affiliation with the Church is purely external, formal. Constantly about means instilling in the child the confidence that you have nothing to answer.
But there are, of course, questions when you can tell the child: ask your confessor about this too. The opinion of the confessor is very important, and it is necessary for the family to know what the child asked and what was answered. Therefore, as a confessor, I try to share children’s questions with parents. In order for children to ask serious questions, I set aside special time in my lessons. I turn on the music and wait patiently. Questions like these allow me to build an interesting lesson. And in order to remember them better, I started a box in the classroom where children put notes with questions. Of course, they ask verbally, but it is important for me that the questions remain recorded. I study the dynamics of issues over recent years, discover some trends, and tell the parents of our students about this.
Outrage at the inappropriate form of the question
Photo: Khuroshvili Ilya
This also happens quite often: a child asks a question, putting it in words that seem insufficiently pious to the parents or somehow too naive, not to say idiotic. For example: “Will there be a giant strawberry in heaven?”, “Is it possible to baptize our cat?”, “Did Jesus Christ have a wife?” and so on. “How dare you say that?!”, “How dare you say that?!” - parents are indignant. As a result, the child develops distrust of them, he is afraid to ask them, so as not to run into reproaches.
A trusting relationship with a child is the most important thing that parents should protect, nurture and develop. A child should always know that no matter what he asks, he will not be shamed, but will be supported.
Refusal to answer questions dictated by idle curiosity
Photo: Jaume Escofet
Sometimes parents feel that the child, when asking his question, is not very interested in the answer, asks “just like that” - and therefore refuses to answer. Maybe they refuse in a correct form, without reproaches, maybe they laugh it off somehow - but one way or another they do not maintain the conversation.
Meanwhile, this is a serious pedagogical mistake. Even if the question is caused by empty curiosity, it is still a signal for parents that the child is experiencing a lack of communication. Clinging to his parents, seeing their eyes, he begins to simply ask what comes to mind. But such “idle questions” can only be a prelude to a real conversation. With these questions, the child may be testing you: do you even hear him? And if we shoot him down with an “empty” question, he won’t ask the real question that worries him, which for some reason he can’t ask right away: he’s embarrassed, he’s afraid. Therefore, parents should answer even an empty question, while thinking about what will happen next? Where will the conversation go?
Let me give you an example from one book. The child saw a cat in the entrance and wanted to pet it, but his dad was against it:
- Don't pet her, she has fleas!
- Where did she get fleas from? - asks the child.
- From another cat.
- Where did she get it from?
And dad patiently explains:
- That cat got infected from a cat from another entrance, and so on ad infinitum!
And then the child says:
- Dad, only numbers can be infinite!
And dad understands that his child is a philosopher! A cat is just a pretext for conversation, the child is interested in life, the child already knows that there is an infinity of numbers, but there is no infinity of cats.
Child psychologists say that children ask the most interesting, deepest questions before the age of 13. And then adults’ “footballing” and social stereotypes ground the child and extinguish his philosophical interests. The child becomes “like everyone else” - he doesn’t stick his head out, is afraid of ridicule, and protects the boundaries of his personal space. That's why young children need to answer even their strangest questions. And these questions, despite all their outward naivety, can turn out to be incredibly deep.
I will give examples from my family life. When one of my daughters was five years old, she realized that all people are mortal, that this is inevitable - and she cried. I began to console her, told her about the Kingdom of Heaven, about God and eternal life. She calmed down a little, and then, already falling asleep, said: “Dad, I will miss you when you die!” I began to console her again, and she suddenly asked: “Dad, will you recognize me in heaven?”
This childish question is actually incredibly deep and spiritual. After all, here, in earthly life, a person often sees only the external, and what is stored inside, that is, the souls of even close people, are closed to him, and therefore already there, outside of earthly existence, he simply does not recognize these souls, he will pass by , they will remain an unsolved mystery for him. Only those who, during their lifetime, have grown together in souls and become akin will recognize each other. A five-year-old child, of course, cannot yet express this in an adult way, but he is quite capable of feeling it.
Another example, with another daughter. She then, it seems, was not yet four years old - and before going to bed she asks: “Dad, do I have a little one in my tummy?” I was taken aback, I answered: “What are you doing, daughter, go to sleep!” And she, not satisfied with my answer, asks: “Well, maybe like a grain?” I was somehow confused: well, I shouldn’t tell such a little girl about the reproductive system! He muttered something like, “Well, we’ll talk later...” And she somehow sighed: “It’s a pity... I would call her Tyoma.”
And here you realize that you’re simply not ready for such a conversation, you’re not ready for the fact that a child at that age can think and feel so deeply, that motherhood is already awakening in him, and you can’t just say to him, “When you grow up, I’ll tell you,” you need to prepare your answers in advance.
One-time response
Photo: Alston Huang
When a child asks and you answer, this does not mean that the topic is closed. The child received an answer from you - but this is only the beginning of the conversation. It is important that he receives an answer to the same question from other people. If a child asks his mother a question, she must then tell dad about it: that’s what he asked, and that’s what I answered him. It’s very good if dad comes up to the child and says: “You know, mom told me what question you asked her. It's very good that you think so deeply! And for my part, I could answer you like this..."
That is, it is important that the child has a three-dimensional perception of the world, and not a flat, monotonous one. After all, men and women think slightly differently, and will tell stories differently, and the result will be a stereo effect.
In addition, even if no one except you will answer this question for the child, it would be good after some time, when the child becomes older, to return to this conversation, to show him some other facets of the problem that may have previously been inaccessible to him. This, of course, primarily concerns ideological or theological questions like “Where does so much evil come from in the world?”, “Why doesn’t the Bible say anything about dinosaurs?”, “Why doesn’t God stop evil people from offending good people?” and so on. Such questions can never be completely exhausted; the older the child becomes, the deeper the answer he is able to perceive.
And, of course, if the parents answered right away - and feel that they do not really understand this topic, that their answer was too approximate, they need to delve deeper into this, read some literature, ask knowledgeable people - and as soon as possible talk about this with your child again and add to your answer.
Reassessing your knowledge
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It also happens, however, that parents are unshakably confident that they already know everything about Orthodoxy and can answer any question accurately. They answer the children right away - and they answer incorrectly, their answers do not correspond to church tradition. They answer based on some stereotypes that exist in the church environment, on some rumors, and mindlessly repeat someone’s words.
This happens especially often with questions of church life, which are especially acute now, exciting public consciousness. For example, what is considered heresy? Is ecumenism heresy? And parents who fight this heresy on the Internet answer their children accordingly, not trusting the opinion of priests.
Meanwhile, it is very important that the child understands: he has a family, but there is also a church, there is also a confessor, there is also a parish community, and there is no need to confine oneself (including with one’s questions) only within the boundaries of the family. Naturally, I mean a situation where there is an attentive confessor, a healthy community (and there are more and more of them).
If parents turn the child on themselves, then when he grows up, when he turns 14-15 years old, when parental authority falls, he is left alone with his questions. He no longer asks his parents - he doesn’t trust them, and there is no one else around.
Open and sincere
God, the Divine world, the world order - knowledge about this will give your child a sense of security. Security is one of the basic human needs. A child should feel safe in his family, and this feeling should initially be created by parents. But when there are secrets in the family or adults do not answer the questions of younger family members, the child becomes anxious, he feels that something is being hidden from him, and he goes in search of answers without the support of adults. As a result, serious problems can arise.
When there are no confidential conversations between parents and children, “kind” uncles and aunts may appear who can invite your child to an “interesting conversation.” After just a few sessions of such heart-to-heart conversations, the child may develop a feeling that is close to addiction, a narcotic state. Pedophilia and other sexual crimes are common in such sects. At one time, similar cases occurred in many countries (Great Britain, France, Argentina, Australia reported on the “Family” (“Children of God”) sect, where children were forced to engage in “ritual prostitution”). In our difficult times associated with the spread of terrorism in the world, there is a threat of child recruitment into the ranks of terrorists. Recently, sects have appeared that make tempting offers to Russian schools to become successful, rich, more developed and get rid of children's complexes and fears. To prevent this from happening, you need to talk to children openly and sincerely. Such conversations help shape the child's personality. If adults try to laugh it off, change the conversation to another topic, or answer with evasive phrases, children receive a signal: something is wrong.
