Child baptism: rules, recommendations, practical advice

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Published: 02/10/2021

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Baptism of a child: to baptize or not to baptize a child is today the choice of parents. Recently, more and more often, young spouses leave the right of choice to the child “for growth”, not wanting to impose their opinion or religion on him. However, most believing parents still prefer to endow their child with a guardian angel almost from the first days of life, which, according to legend, appears in the child only after his baptism.

There are many questions related to the sacrament of baptism: where to baptize, when, how... Detailed answers, of course, are better to look for from the priest who will conduct the ceremony. But we will try to at least lift the veil of the sacrament called baptism.

• Why is a child baptized?
• When to baptize a child How to choose a name for a child at baptism

Why is a child baptized?

In theory, for truly believing parents, such a question should not arise at all, since the Bible says that “whoever is not born of water and the Spirit cannot enter the Kingdom of God” and “Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved; and whoever does not believe will be condemned.”

And a baptized child, therefore, is under the protection of God, and in addition, he has his own guardian angel and intercessor (the saint whose name the child is named at baptism).

What should parents do who belong to different religions? In such cases, first of all, they will have to agree among themselves about what religion they would like for their child.

And, if Orthodoxy is chosen, then the child will be baptized according to Orthodox customs, only a parent of another faith will not be able to be present during the ceremony. It is only important to remember that this choice is not an easy matter, and if you baptize your child, try to continue to adhere to Orthodox traditions regarding his upbringing.

Countries where there are no Orthodox churches, how to baptize a child

Parents face the problem of baptism in many countries. The Orthodox Church has not built its parishes everywhere. The question arises: is it possible to perform the baptism ceremony yourself?

The sacrament should be performed by an older family member or a person from outside who is familiar with all the rituals. You must first illuminate the water by reading a special prayer over it. After sprinkling the baby, the prayers “Creed”, “Our Father” and “Virgin Mother of God, Rejoice” are read.

All prayers are available on the Internet. But it is important to memorize them. In any case, a mandatory visit to the temple and conversation with the priest will be required.

It is important to understand that this will not be a second baptism, but only an addition to it. Therefore, it is necessary for parents to notify the priest about all the nuances of the previously performed ritual. There is no need to delay this too much.

When to baptize a child

At what age can a child be baptized? Traditionally, a baby is baptized on the 40th day after birth or later. This is due to the fact that a woman is not allowed to enter the temple in the first weeks after giving birth, as she is considered “unclean.”

An earlier baptism is also possible, for example, on the eighth day after the birth of a child, but when the ceremony is performed in a temple, the mother will not be able to attend it.

How to choose a child's name at baptism

In fact, the name is chosen even before baptism, in accordance with the names of those saints whose name appears in the church calendar on your baby’s birthday.

True, it happens that such names do not quite correspond to the modern situation; for example, few parents would agree to name their son Afinogenes or Theopent.

Then choose the name that you like, but when baptizing, still be guided by the church calendar, if the named one does not apply to the Orthodox (for example, Timur - Timothy).

There is a belief that it is necessary to specifically baptize and call a child by different names according to the passport, they say, this will help protect the child from the evil eye.

But this belief has nothing to do with the Orthodox world and came to us from Jewish traditions or Islam. It is impossible to rebaptize a child into a different name if, for example, he gets sick.

Choosing godparents for a child

As a rule, godparents choose close people: relatives, friends. Often they are those who have already been witnesses at the wedding. And this is not forbidden.

In fact, anyone can be a godfather: the godson's grandparents, older brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, friends. There are only seven prohibitions:

1. non-believers;
2. representatives of another religion (even Christian, but non-Orthodox);
3. married to each other (including the parents of the child);
4. monks and nuns;
5. mentally ill;
6. minors;
7. those who came to the temple drunk.

If your child’s future godfather or godmother is non-Orthodox, but wants to be baptized themselves, they must do this in advance, but not on the same day as the baby.

Interesting fact: if the child’s parents are unbaptized, this is not an obstacle to performing the ceremony.

A separate issue is godparents who are married to each other. Popular rumor says: If spouses become godparents, they cannot stand together at the font, otherwise they will separate after three months.

In fact, spouses cannot be godparents at all. Or, after they become godparents, they must stop living married life (this means not so much living together as fulfilling marital duty).

Moreover, if a guy and a girl became godparents and then, after some time, they themselves wanted to get married, according to church canons they cannot do this, since they are already spiritual brother and sister.

Whoever you choose, it should not just be a close person, but a person who is ready to take care of his godson and become his spiritual mentor.

In Catholic countries, by the way, godparents become the first-priority candidates for guardianship in the event of the death of the parents of their godson; and other relatives, even the closest ones, are considered only secondarily.

A child can only have one godfather. But he must be of the same gender as the child.

Responsibilities of godparents

Many people believe that the duties of godparents are to participate in the baptismal ceremony, and then simply give gifts on holidays and spend some time together. At the same time, they forget that this is not all.

It should be important that one of the desires should be care and guardianship of the baby. Let's consider what responsibilities are assigned to godparents according to the Orthodox faith:

• teach the child all the basics of the Christian faith, and also learn prayers with him. The responsibilities of the godfather and mother during the baptism of a boy in this case are no different;
• teach mercy, kindness and love by example;
• The imprisoned parents must know all the necessary prayers, as well as wear a pectoral cross and be able to apply the sign of the cross correctly.

The responsibilities of the godmother and father during baptism should be all possible assistance in preparing for the sacrament and its further celebration.

Godparents must give a gift; it could be a cross, an icon of the baby’s patron saint, or a baptismal set. This can be agreed upon with the child’s parents.

When baptizing a girl, a woman should be ready to receive the child after immersion in the font, as well as change the baby’s clothes and, if necessary, calm her down. When a boy is baptized, the man does all this.

After the celebration, it is also necessary to devote a lot of time to the child, focusing on his spiritual development. Now you know all the differences between the baptism of a boy and a girl, which means there should be no problems. It is known that compliance with all the rules is the key to the health and strength of a child, regardless of his gender.

The correct choice of godparents is a guarantee of the child’s good spiritual development, which means there will be fewer bad deeds in his life.

Is it possible to baptize a child at home or outside the temple?

The practice of the church has not changed over time. The canons do not prohibit performing activities outside the temple, but in this case the child must have health reasons. In practice, there are often cases of baptism in a hospital. An important condition is the absence of immersion, as this can be dangerous for the child. Sprinkling with holy water is performed.

Also, such a retreat takes place in areas very remote from the nearest parish. In this case, family members, parents or godparents must organize all the action. The baby is not immersed in the font, but is simply sprinkled with water.

There are also differences in the ritual between boys and girls. There is one serious nuance in the baptism of boys - carrying around the altar three times. If all actions are maintained, baptism is considered completed for the boy.

Baptism of a child in church: features and recommendations for parents

Christianity requires the baptism of children and adults, which is considered one of the main sacraments of the Orthodox Church.

There is a belief that Baptism protects a person (and primarily a child) from the influence of evil forces on him, revives his spirituality, and opens the doors to the Kingdom of Heaven.

Preparing for a child's baptism

Preparation for the sacrament involves the purchase of a baptismal kit, preliminary conversations with a clergyman and the choice of godfather and mother.

The baptismal set includes a shirt (diaper), a pectoral cross and an icon depicting the patron saint. For female infants, a hat or scarf is added.

A baptismal shirt (kryzhma) is considered a miraculous amulet and must be kept throughout the life of its owner. With its help, traditional healers remove curses and help in the treatment of serious diseases.

Relatives and godparents should first visit the priest and ask him all the necessary questions about the upcoming ceremony. He will tell you in detail what is needed to properly participate in it.

To take photos or videos, you must obtain his approval and blessing. On the day of christening, you must have the baby's birth certificate with you. Based on this, a baptismal certificate will be issued.

What to buy for baptism

Before baptism, the godmother must buy a cloth in which the baby will then be wrapped after immersion in the font. She should also purchase a baptismal set, which includes a shirt, cap and blanket.

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In addition, the godmother must have a silk handkerchief during the christening, which she must then present to the priest after the completion of the mysterious ceremony.

The godfather must buy a small pectoral cross before baptism. If the cross was purchased outside the church, then it must be consecrated before baptism.

If it was purchased at a church store, there is no need to consecrate it. In addition, the responsibility for the financial part of the ceremony falls on the shoulders of the godfather. That is, he must pay at the church for all services.

However, if one of the godparents has financial difficulties, then the baby’s parents or one of the godparents can take on the payment for church services or the purchase of a baptismal set. This point is not fundamental.

The child’s parents, in turn, must purchase new clothes for their child and candles before baptism (the church itself will tell you how many candles you need to have at the time of baptism).

In addition, they are obliged to set the table at home; this custom was observed many years ago. The church will tell you everything else, and will also help you decide on a church name for the baby and help you prepare baptismal documents.

How to choose a cross for a child's baptism

In fact, there are no regulations on this matter. But in general, a small cross with rounded edges (so as not to get hurt) is more practical for a child.

It does not have to be a cross made of gold or silver; For the christening of a small child, you can buy an ordinary metal one, and later, for the first birthday, for example, buy a more expensive one.

Where to perform the baptism ceremony

It is preferable, of course, to baptize a child in a church. You can choose your parish at your discretion. But lately, young parents have been leaning towards small churches, often even in rural areas.

The motives are simple: large churches are becoming more and more like a store (you have to pay for everything: the consecration of the cross, the baptism itself, the certificate, and besides, they will persuade you to buy a bunch of additional and not very necessary things for the child’s baptism).

In large churches, the rite of baptism is “on stream”, so it is often carried out without a soul. In a small village church, priests are more likely to show sincerity in performing the sacrament.

The church has no right to refuse you the ceremony because you are “not local.” But you still shouldn’t insist: if you and your child are not welcome here, then why come here?

You can baptize your child at home or even in the hospital where you gave birth. But such cases are usually reserved for urgent needs, for example, if the child is sick. In addition, the priest’s visit to your home will, of course, have to be paid for separately.

Rite: child baptism (process)

Throughout the ceremony, the godparents stand next to the priest and one of them holds the child in his arms. Before performing the ceremony, a priest in white robes walks around the room where the ceremony is taking place and reads three prayers.

After this, he asks the godfathers to turn with their godson to the west - symbolically there is the abode of Satan.

After this, the priest asks several questions, which the godparents answer. These questions may differ in different churches, but mostly they sound like this: “Do you renounce Satan?” “Or do you renounce all his works?” “Or do you renounce all service to him?” All questions should be answered “I renounce. »Questions and answers are repeated three times.

After this, the godparents must read the “Creed” - a brief summary of the foundations of the Christian religion, which all believers must know by heart.

Then anointing occurs: the priest, with a cross-shaped movement, smears the child’s forehead, eyes, mouth, ears, chest, arms and legs with myrrh. After this, the rite of baptism is carried out directly - immersing the child in the font three times.

What to wear for a baptism for a child and parents

Parents must be dressed according to Christian Orthodox laws: women with their shoulders and legs covered and their heads covered, men with their heads uncovered. The rest: trousers or a long skirt, a dress or a suit is a matter of your desire.

The main thing is that the outfit is not provocative.

They sell an assortment of baptismal sets for a child: a diaper, an envelope, a cap, and a baptismal shirt with embroidery. All this is very beautiful and, perhaps, helps parents create a festive atmosphere.

But it’s not at all necessary. All you need for baptism is a baptismal shirt (you can also use a regular white clean vest), a clean diaper and a towel (or another diaper to dry the baby after immersion in the font).

When the child is baptized, he should be in only a diaper, without clothes or a diaper. The child is given a baptismal shirt after the ceremony has been completed.

Video: how the baptism ceremony of a child takes place in church

Baptism a second time is not acceptable

According to the canons of the Russian Orthodox Church, it is strictly forbidden to baptize a person more than once. Since birth for a soul can only happen once. Those baptized in childhood can always come to God and live according to his commandments; for this there is no need to perform the sacred sacrament again.

Main signs:

1. It is forbidden to choose a godmother while pregnant or at the beginning of the menstrual cycle.
2. It is necessary to properly prepare for the great sacrament. Do not use too bright colors in your appearance, but black is also prohibited. Light festive outfit.
3. There must be an even number of guests at the event. It is recommended to invite only two parents and two godparents.
4. Baptism is not reported to anyone except loved ones.
5. In the morning, take large bills and count them several times. When the baby grows up, he will not have any financial problems.
6. This day should be a day off and no housework should be done.
7. If guests remain at home, then it is forbidden to open the door until the parents return from church with their already baptized child.
8. No conflicts.
9. The clothes a person wore at the time of baptism should be preserved throughout his life. After death, he takes her with him.

Godparents need to memorize the Creed prayer. This must be done for the well-being of the baby.

What to give a child for baptism

Traditionally, symbols of faith are given - a cross, an icon with the image of the patron saint - they are presented by godparents. They can also buy (or better yet, sew with their own hands) a baptismal diaper and shirt for a child’s baptism. By the way, it can then be passed on “by inheritance.”

But if you absolutely want to give something, choose gifts related to the Orthodox faith (Bible, rosary, amulet, icon) or traditional ones: a silver spoon, a rattle...

Christening gifts should be purely symbolic, because the main gift for your child is the sacrament itself, which opens a window to the righteous world and makes it possible to find a protector and patron.

Girl's baptism and boy's baptism - are there any differences?

Usually, any christening for girls and boys is not much different. Everything happens according to the usual scenario, the only difference is that the girl will not be brought into the altar. At christening, a girl's head is covered with a headdress.

If the parents have chosen two godparents for their child, both a mother and a father, then in this case, the godmother first holds the child in her arms, and after dipping into the font, the godfather takes him in her arms.

In addition, the godfather must accept the child from the hands of the priest, and then bring him to the altar. Such actions are the main differences between the baptism ceremony of a girl and a boy.

It is worth remembering that every boy is a potential church minister in the future, and only men can serve at the altar. That’s why women are not allowed to the altar, because her main role is to be her husband’s assistant.

If you correctly follow all the requirements and Orthodox traditions regarding the rite of baptism of a child, then the child will grow up strong and happy. The correct choice of godparents, father and mother, will also have a beneficial effect on the fate of the child.

The spiritual life of a child with good godparents will develop, which means he will commit fewer bad deeds that are considered sinful in Christian life. A correct and balanced approach to the ordering of this issue will make the child protected and happy.

Orthodox Life

There is one moment that can be useful in the life of every Orthodox Christian; it will help save the soul of another person, making it fit for the Kingdom of Heaven. This is the celebration of the Sacrament of Baptism by a lay person. It is performed only in case of mortal danger over a person and when there is no clergyman nearby and there is no opportunity to turn to him.

Here is how Saint Peter (Mogila) writes about this in his catechetical work “Orthodox Confession of the Catholic and Apostolic Church of the East”: “Also, no one else should perform the established Baptism except a legitimate Priest. However, in case of any need, this Sacrament can be performed by a lay person, male or female, by taking a decent substance - simple and natural water, and pronouncing the mentioned words: “In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit” with threefold immersion. Such Baptism has such power that, although it is not repeated, it is an undoubted guarantee of eternal salvation.”

In the “Handbook for a Clergyman” it is written about this: “However, a dangerously ill child can be baptized in the absence of a priest by a deacon, a psalm-reader, and even a layman: a man or a woman. A layman who, out of necessity, has taken upon himself to perform the Sacrament of Baptism must be a believing Christian and be aware of the importance of this Sacrament. In addition, he must correctly pronounce the mystical words: “The servant of God (servant of God, named) is baptized in the name of the Father (first immersion), and the Son (second immersion), and the Holy Spirit” (third immersion). Upon recovery, a person baptized in this way must be taken to the priest along with the person who performed the Baptism. The priest, having previously made sure through a detailed questioning that the Baptism was performed correctly, only completes the Baptism and performs the sacrament of Confirmation.”

In modern practice (for example, in a hospital, in an intensive care unit), it is possible to baptize a person through dousing, the main thing is that the secret words are pronounced correctly: “The servant of God, named, is baptized in the name of the Father, amen (immersed in water or sprinkled with water), and the Son, amen (immersed in water or sprinkled with water), and the Holy Spirit, amen (immersed in water or sprinkled with water).”

It is noteworthy that church history also knows in exceptional cases baptism with sand (earth), since water in the Sacrament of Baptism also symbolizes earth, burial with Christ. Blessed John Moschus in his book “The Spiritual Meadow” tells the following story: “When I was young,” said Abba Andrew, “I behaved dissolutely. Scolding and rioting began. And so I, along with nine others, fled to Palestine. However, one of them was a Jew. In the desert he weakened to the point of complete exhaustion, and we all lost heart, not knowing what to do with him. However, we did not abandon him, but each carried him on himself to the best of his ability. We wanted to carry him to the city or to the pier so as not to let him die in the desert. But the young man was close to death from hunger and scorching thirst, from severe fever and terrible fatigue. Then, shedding tears over him, we decided to leave him in the desert. Fear attacked us, as if we ourselves would die of thirst. Seeing that we were about to leave, he began to conjure us: “In the name of God, who comes to judge the living and the dead, do not let me die a Jew. I wish to be a Christian. Do me a favor and baptize me so that I can end my life as a Christian and go to the Lord.” “Brother,” we told him, “alas, we are laymen, and this is the work of bishops and priests. And there’s nowhere to get water here.” But he persistently, with tears, implored us: “Christians, do not deprive me of this gift.” We were in the greatest difficulty. Then one of us, as if inspired from above, says: “Lift him up and undress him!” With great difficulty we got him to his feet and took off his clothes. The industrious worker, filling his hands with sand, sprinkled it on the Jew’s head three times, saying: “The servant of God Theodore is baptized in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit,” and to each invocation of the Holy, Consubstantial and Worshiped Trinity we exclaimed: “Amen!” And Christ, the Son of the Living God, healed and so strengthened the weak that there was not the slightest sign of weakness left in him. On the contrary, he was in good health, with renewed strength, and cheerfully walked ahead of us through the desert. Arriving in Ascalon, we told the bishop of the city, Blessed Dionysius, about everything that had happened to us. The holy man, having listened to the story, was struck by an extraordinary sign.”

There are also cases when in Siberia, due to enormous distances, natural conditions and a limited number of priests, clergymen blessed, in case of their long absence, to baptize children (people of fear for the sake of mortals) to some pious Orthodox Christian (Christian), and then the priest made up for the baptism performed layman.

The main and indispensable condition for baptism by a layman is that he himself be an Orthodox Christian. The origins of lay baptism can be seen in the Holy Scriptures: “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a special people, to proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light; once not a people, but now the people of God; who once did not obtain mercy, but have now obtained mercy” (1 Pet. 2:9, 10). This appeal of the Holy Supreme Apostle Peter sounds, of course, to all of us.

Also, the following two main conditions for the baptism of a person by a layman are a threat to the life of the person being baptized and the impossibility of turning to a priest in a short period of time.

It seems to me that it is especially important for Orthodox doctors and nurses to know the secret formula in order to baptize a person in the face of imminent death. It takes less than a minute, and the person will be saved, the doors to the Kingdom of Heaven will open for him. I repeat once again the secret formula, which must be observed during baptism:

“The servant of God (servant of God) (name) is baptized in the name of the Father, amen (immersed in water or sprinkled with water), and the Son, amen (immersed in water or sprinkled with water), and the Holy Spirit, amen (immersed in water or sprinkled with water) water)".

If a person survives, then he must turn to a clergyman so that he can complete the Sacrament of Baptism. This replenishment mainly consists of performing the Sacrament of Confirmation on the newly enlightened person, which can only be performed by a priest.

Archpriest Andrey Chizhenko

Signs associated with the baptism of a child

• Do not wipe up water that gets on the baby during baptism
• To make your child lucky in life, try to treat the first person you meet with a piece of bread or a roll on the way to church.
• If a boy and a girl are being baptized at the same time, make sure the boy is baptized first.
• If a child screams during the ceremony, this is very good! In some areas it is believed that if a child behaves too calmly during baptism, then he is too good to live on this earth.
• It is considered very bad luck if your child is the first to be baptized in a new church.
• Water that gets on the child’s face during the baptism ceremony cannot be wiped off; it should be allowed to dry. Small children, as a rule, do not like it very much when water gets on their face and begin to react violently, but those present should be patient and not wipe the water off the baby’s face.
• It was widely believed that newborn children were most vulnerable to the actions of evil spirits. Therefore, to protect against them, the child was periodically covered with an item of her father’s clothing before the baptismal ceremony. To protect against evil spirits, garlic, bread, salt or a piece of iron were also placed in the baby’s crib.
• It is not advisable for a small child to be baptized immediately after the funeral. If it takes place immediately after the wedding, then the child will grow up cheerful and rich.
• In order for the baby to grow up happy, healthy and rich, the child’s mother must bring a silver coin, an egg and a pinch of salt to the baptism ceremony.

Perhaps someone will think that observing all these rituals is unnecessary, they say, and it will work out that way. But, perhaps, we should not neglect these essentially simple rules and conduct experiments in such an important matter as the rite of baptism. After all, the future of a child largely depends on the awareness and moderation of their parents.